When I met the woman who later became my wife, she had 20 month old twins. I adopted them at age 4, and we have since had 2 more kids. Happily married 21 years this past June.

My sister has two boys 13 and 15.. She dates some but is Very upfront about the boys. She does not want them to get hurt again after their father the *erk . She does Not introduce them to anyone unless she feel comfortable and the boys and whomever she is dating understands this.

Its had to find a Nice guy ESP when you have 2 kids. She finally meet someone who is Great with two girls of his own so he understands
This weekend was the first time they all meet and had a great time She waited three months for this to happen

Give her a chance. Just make sure your not getting sucked in for a paycheck

Maybe she's where you belong. Seams like its worked for alot of people on here.

Good Luck and oh yea Dont forget the flowers We ALL like that

Shannon

[This message has been edited by njcwgrl (edited 08-01-2010).]

Been there done that. actually on a serious note i found it to be kinda cool to have a newborn on my hip that wasnt even mine.

that was 2 years ago tho

quote Originally posted by njcwgrl: ,........

again PLEASE avoid discussion my example lol, but again i will respond kuz im awesome
a girl havig a kid doesnt change my opinion of her at all, and the "baby daddy" is for sure not an issue as far as them getting back together. i know the troubles the biological parent can cause in situations like this, but i also have a lot of experience having been thru a lot of it (as the chld tho lol).

(i would easily be the best bf shes ever had...but, then again, i AM awesome hehe... . girls near my age in my area are STUPID. i dont say it out of hate, either, its simply the truth. damn near every girl i know who has a good personality, looks at least decent, and is generally a good person who deserves the best, ALWAYS go for and get stuck on complete douchebags, and i wont tolerate that. lost almost all my female friends beause they were all that way and didnt listen to reason. i will NOT stand by and watch them make themselves suffer, and they wouldnt listen so i said buhbye.

im very bored and not in the best mood, so i rambled a bit hehe)

I don't think I could deal with that, however... The one I'm with has spent a lot of time raising her sister's kids (both sisters have 'em - oldest sister has one who is nearly a year old, middle sister has two girls that are nearly 4 I think). We've been together for a little while now and her nephew has taken a shine to me. It is weird going out and having people think I'm the dad.

Best thing about our situation is being able to hand them back to their (single) mothers when they're unruly.

All things considered, however, I'm too young to deal with that and I know a woman my age isn't going to be best at dealing with it either.

quote Originally posted by skuzzbomer: All things considered, however, I'm too young to deal with that and I know a woman my age isn't going to be best at dealing with it either.

ah, a big point i forgot to mention...a MAJOR thing contributing to my opinion (at least with the chick i know) is that she isnt the primary caregiver (ATM at least. i assume it would likely change when she is older)

quote Originally posted by faaaaq: ah, a big point i forgot to mention...a MAJOR thing contributing to my opinion (at least with the chick i know) is that she isnt the primary caregiver (ATM at least. i assume it would likely change when she is older)

Sooo... now that we have all answered about what we would do without giving you advice...

What have you decided?

quote Originally posted by theBDub: Sooo... now that we have all answered about what we would do without giving you advice... What have you decided?

lol i really wasnt asking for advice. and i already said i would date someone with a kid without hesitation

Only trouble I see with most women with kids is, they are way too protective of the children.. hmm.. let me explain . in the 3 women I have been with that had kids, the kids could do no wrong. they would break the rules and you could NOT punish them in any way because as they put it. ( that is my kid not yours ) .. I tell ya, had the kids been punished they mighta turned out ok growing up later in life but you cannot teach a kid something is wrong when the mom is there saying nono it's ok take his car and get tickets in it.. or oh you were at a game and your friends keyed the car? it's rough, once in a while you might find a decent woman that has raised her kids up right and they are respectful but it is far and few between. I think dating them is ok, but I don't know about marrying them. Been there did that, didnt' work , moved on.. live with them and when the kids become psycho, you won't lose everything you own when ya set them out on their own..

Bitter? Nah, just speaking from experience.
James

I did, (so did two other guys), I was her third marriage. I divorced the b itch after 2 1/2 years. That was 28 years ago.

I loved being a stepdad, the son was not the reason for ending the marriage. Simply put, it was her.

I would say NO, if I met her again.

I would say yes for any other women.

no single answer - especially not knowing any ages or stages of life.

overall - if under 30 - I would avoid it.
and - another apsect is - is the babies daddy in the picture? HUGE issue right there.

and - date - with what intent? actual relation or passing time?

and - the other side - if she hasnt had kids - why the heck not? what is wrong with her?

quote Originally posted by Pyrthian: and - the other side - if she hasnt had kids - why the heck not? what is wrong with her?

Ya never know until ya meet them.....The girl I am currently dating is 41, and had ovaraian cancer at age 20. She wanted kids, but just couldnt due to the surgury.