Nowhere really, just been pretty busy with domestic life which has taken a dramatic turn of late.
18 months ago, (more or less) wife and I tried to get her mother out of a bad situation up in extreme NE Texas. She was widowed some years ago and lived alone in her home for a few months then her adult son (Jane's brother) moved back home after a LOONG period of bumming around the country living the life of a beggar. He became her 'caregiver' and I use that word loosely. She had developed Alzheimer's, at age 81. We tried to get Adult Protective Services involved so we could bring her to live out her days with us here in Central Texas and they did make a quick visit to the mobile home, but swore they saw nothing wrong, (no vermin, no trash, no fall hazards etc ..she must have been blinded by the 'this looks like more paper work for us illness) and as long as she refused to leave, there was nothing they could do.
Long story short, the son suddenly keeled over dead 2nd week of Oct, and other than his mother, thru out the extended family, not a single tear was shed for his passing.
I try not to speak ill of the dead, the useless lazy, thieving, drug addict adult (late 40s) son was taking advantage of his mother's finances to further his trade in stock, not caring for her at all, the home (if it could be called that) was filthy with MILLIONS of roaches alive and dead everywhere, including inside the refrigerator, but, .........my mother in law now lives with us. She's not very cognizant of why or maybe even (at times) where she is, but it's a done deal. It's a 'round the clock job for us as she wanders the house at all hours of the night, along with the little (but very old) Chihuahua dog she absolutely dotes on.
Lots more I could say, but I'm glad she's here, and we're able to give her a clean, nice place to live out her remaining years. I know things are going to get worse with her dementia (both my father and a close B-I-L died from it when I lived at the old place in E Tx) but being as she is a US Army veteran, we do have some help available to us thru VA and her SS health benefits..Fort Hood and the Central Tx VA health care facilities are almost within sight of my back yard. I have additional locks and alarms on all the doors and vid cams on both front and rear entrances but she is not at all a 'prisoner' in our home, but we do have to accompany her when she goes outside.
Thanks for the update, MJ. You certainly are continuing your life of service to the country, and more importantly, to your loved ones. I'm glad your MIL has a safe, clean and supervised place to live.
I can appreciate the effort this takes. Some are blessed to have family or friends to step in when necessary/needed. Mary Jane and you are a blessing to her mom. Some folks simply don't deserve the air they breath or the love a Mother gives to them. Sounds like her son was one of those.
Just a thought that crossed my mind. The reason "good guys" are not as abundant as we would like is that guys like you tell us the stuff they are doing. I mean it doesn't take a genius to see that's a lot of hard work and effort!!!
The hard part Pokey, is seeing her in this condition. It didn't have to be this way and she's had a hard hard life and deserved so much more. The rest? Ehh, just part of life. I was a single parent with 4 kids so I'm used to cleaning up messes, took care of my twin in his last weeks of life after 18 months of brain surgeries and chemo, fighting for his life against cancer when he was too week to even walk. Heck, I've pulled dead rotting calves out of their mommas, piece by stinking piece. This, is nothing..
As an Asian guy once said "It's an honor to care for our elderly, after all, they gave us life", and my mother in law, gave me my Jane. I owe her.
[This message has been edited by maryjane (edited 11-11-2025).]
Wow... You're a good man, Don. Having been on the periphery of a similar situation (my wife's father) I was going to suggest that you "buckle up". But it seems like you've been there at least once, so...
You are a good man for taking care of your family.
Try giving your mother-in-law ketone supplements. It can help with Alzheimer and dementia. The supplements are cheap and natural. It should help or at least slow down her decline. There are many studies on it that you can find online if you want to research it yourself. The supplements are easier to do than to go with the full Atkins diet.
