You should be able to include a "test question" on your part of the walmart moneygram, and all he has to do is answer it correctly and they give him the funds. When you fill out the form, you include the test question and the correct answer. I've sent $$ to my grandchildren like that within the last year when they didn't yet have an official ID.
Never mind, Don beat me to it. Done that for my grandkids as well before they got IDs. Also if they are on the road you can put it on the line I think they called it and it would become available Nationwide. Some bus stations used to have Western Unions right there as well. That you should check on as well.
Steve
------------------ Technology is great when it works, and one big pain in the ass when it doesn't
kids--when little, they step on your toes--older, they step on your heartstrings. Hope everything works out fine Pokey. And pokey..you DO know for sure it is actually him asking for assistance--right? Been a scam going around for a couple years that involves some dirtbag texting or emailing, posing as a friend or relative in temporary but dire need of $$ assistance...
[This message has been edited by maryjane (edited 03-12-2016).]
If he was in a wal mart look the number up and see if they will do a page for him to come to the service desk, they may they may not but hey it's worth a try.
kids--when little, they step on your toes--older, they step on your heartstrings. Hope everything works out fine Pokey. And pokey..you DO know for sure it is actually him asking for assistance--right? Been a scam going around for a couple years that involves some dirtbag texting or emailing, posing as a friend or relative in temporary but dire need of $$ assistance...
I did speak to him personally. he was using a mobile phone of a couple of girls there at Walmart.
I had a D track on the phone and have that info. He lost his wallet,phone and part of his gear from his back pack. Extremely good natured kid so I'm certain the girls were taken with him. They are going back to the Walmart for me to see if they can find him. I have arrangements figured out now just need to tell him. Both walmart and greyhound use the password system.
Hopefully he doesn't just "find" his way back. That is my fear. It is what I did when I was his age and I wouldn't trade it and don't regret it. It just that when the shoe is on the other foot I don't agree with it. Rather do things risk free. Besides the world isn't the same.
He already said he wanted to see if he could get some work in at a ranch or farm he had passed and spoke with a work hand there.
I'm concerned and jealous at the same time. Stupid kids!
quote
Originally posted by 84fiero123:
If he was in a wal mart look the number up and see if they will do a page for him to come to the service desk, they may they may not but hey it's worth a try.
Steve
I'm going to try that Steve. The girls think he went to some church shelter.
[This message has been edited by pokeyfiero (edited 03-12-2016).]
I'm going to try that Steve. The girls think he went to some church shelter.
They didn't 't happen to say if they knew the one he went to did they.? Next would be to check the shelters in the area and call the closest one and ask.
I hope the girls think enough to have a page made for him if they know his last name. Shelters this time of year are full up, hopefully he will find one and it will have room. Kind of cold overnight still there I think, if he can't if the wal mart was a super store and almost all of those are open 24 hours so he can just walk around the store all night.
[This message has been edited by 84fiero123 (edited 03-13-2016).]
They are there right now and he is no where to be found.
Sh!t
Sorry we couldn't have told you those things sooner and hope he is OK. Wish we could do more but until he calls back you are limited I think to what we have already told you. You did tell him he could call back collect didn't you. If he goes to a police station they may allow him to call you from there. he didn't say what wal mart it was did he? if so you might want to call the closest station and ask them to keep an eye out for him, they might do that.
I know how worrisome (and aggravating) it can be Pokey. Not knowing, fearing bad things.....but when he gets home, (and he will), put your arm around him while you're fussin at him for making you worry and give him a squeeze. Wish I were closer and could help.
It probably doesn't help to know that other parents have gone through the same thing; the memories come flooding back. Praying that you have best outcome possible.
It probably doesn't help to know that other parents have gone through the same thing; the memories come flooding back. Praying that you have best outcome possible.
I am not his biological parent. His parents are not bad people just very hard working extremely ignorant people. They have 4 kids in a little tiny house of two bedrooms. Being extraordinarily independent has made it too difficult for them to handle him.
For the last ten years he has been kinda a adopted child due to circumstances beyond his control. My wife and I are the only ones he trusts. So many things would be different if I had legal guardianship as my hands are often tied.
I had kept him busy and learning until about 3 years back I had gotten very sick and was hospitalized in and out all year. During that time he hooked up with a bunch of losers and started doing drugs. He hid it from me for a long time but told me last year and asked for help.
He does fine until his parents start in on him. His father is so old school tough guy he thinks yelling at him or hitting him will just fix him. All he ever really wants is just to spend time with his father but that just ain't happening.It never going to happen. Every time that happens we go right back to square one.
Done it 4 times or so now so I got him in a ranch Rehab in Oregon. It is a working ranch some cop buddies told me about. Said it would be perfect for him. They cut him loose 2 weeks early out of the 8. This place has a zero tolerance discipline system. He got buddied up with a new arrival making him responsible for the new guy. New guy had to wear a orange construction vest signifying disciplinary action no talking or being talked to by anyone. Well he talked even though he wasn't supposed to and when he got in trouble he said it wasn't fair that he had to be buddied with a thug loser and I guess he was pretty adamant about it.
He told me he apologized for his anger but they cut him anyway. Out the door, on the street, no money not even a phone call. It is in the contract. I had to read it to believe it. Not money back either for the time he isn't there. Says first offense after the first month is last offence. No point in me even arguing with them. They have thirty people trying to get in with parents cash in hand.
He is clean and clear headed and I don't want him in a situation of any kind. Once he is back here we can go from there. His parents can't force anything on him since he is 18 now. He has to go to court in one month to show he is clean and went to rehab and the charge of minor with possession of illegal substance will be held and probation will be he has to stay under my authority for one year. If he screws up before we get to court the judge is not apt to be lenient at all. He could get up to one year in jail.
Everyone likes him. The cops, the judge, his PD, anyone he meets. His demeanor is always respectful and polite. He has a strong sense of right and wrong. He has been out working grown men since he was 13. Several places have an open offer of full time work for him. He has that much potential. I myself do not understand addiction. It is not in my genes. I know it exists but it makes no sense to me. All we need is a little more time and effort and he can get rid of this monkey he let on his back when he was only 15.
He doesn't have to be in that yelling screaming environment. He has no issues when with us. His trigger is when he tries to be with them. As an adult now I think he has the tools to deal with his family issues. Just need to get his ass back safe and give him one year to show him that being a man relying on himself doesn't mean he left his family.
He will learn he doesn't need anyone to stay strong but if he needs more than the mandatory year well then he can have another here. There are plenty of kids not on there own at that age anyway. If he gets out on his own by 21 I think he will still be ahead of the curve.
If I don't here from him in the morning I'll report him missing to the cops. He is 18 and released into my care but until the judge says so he isn't in my legal custody. So not sure if the cops will help.
Sounds like you're far more than a biological parent Pokey--you're a loving, caring Dad. Saying a few prayers for you and he. It's a tuff call regarding calling the police, but I think that's the best avenue if you don't hear anything soon.
Dam still nothing, I hoped when I got up this morning you would have at least heard something from him. Even if this was some sort of scam I hoped you would have heard something back from him. I wish I could think of something else you could do, short of calling the shelters first thing like right now if not sooner I can't think of anything else.
Did you at least get what wal mart he was at? that gives you a starting point to do a search of the local homeless shelters and start with the closest ones. They may not say if he is there, privacy and such but at least you can leave his name with them and ask them if he comes in to tell him you are looking for him and to call you back.
I know how scared I was when I learned my oldest had just gone off to Hawaii and gave up custody of my grandsons, I am sure some remember me asking about our Hawaii members. They never grow up to the people that care about them, they will always be kids to us, be we parents, grandparents, adoptive parents or what.
Good vibes he calls before I finish this post.
Oh crap I didn't see that he is 18, that may complicate finding him using the police's help. They may not even take a missing persons report for 24 to 48 hours. I know that is not something you wanted to hear but that maybe the case in some states, it is here and in MA. He is considered an adult.
Here is a list of places he may have gone if he could even get in.
I've been following and unable to help. I admire your efforts to guide this young man. It's not easy and the drug thing kind of stacks the odds against you but that doesn't mean that you can't do it. Carry on and thank you.
He was unable to get the departing 2:05 bus because he didn't call me in time for the arrangements.
Fortunately we were able to get the 8:05 bus. I am fairly confident he got on. No way to be 100% certain of course unless he finds a way to call. So he had to wait all day to get on it. I was going to arrange some cash for him to go eat and such but a young lady intervened. The same girl whom helped him yesterday called me to find out how he was doing picked him up and took him to lunch and I hope got him back to get on bus.
They have this boy so pumped up with God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I keep thinking if I hear one more thing about Gods will I' go nuts!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I need God to give me strength cause I'm not doing to good. I'm just reaping to myself over and over....God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs
My latest new friend used to cook meth and deal it. He got Jesus while he was in prison and it changed his life around. Unless he's conning me. Sometimes he does have the sound of a con man. Anyway he sounds like a highly moral man today and I would never have been his friend before he went to prison. Time will tell. I've heard of more than one man getting his life turned around that way. He knows that I'm an agnostic but if religion is what turned him around I'm all for it in his case.
Meth is without a doubt, far and away the very worst thing to befall civilized America in my lifetime. There are probably few of us who have not seen the destruction first hand.
Meth is without a doubt, far and away the very worst thing to befall civilized America in my lifetime. There are probably few of us who have not seen the destruction first hand.
I tried it back in the days when I was experimenting. I didn't care for it and everyone that I knew who was using it was a better person before they began. I've seen some of them who were terrible people. Maybe they were terrible before but I suspect that it brings out the worst in people.
They have this boy so pumped up with God!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I keep thinking if I hear one more thing about Gods will I' go nuts!!!!!!!!!!!
I think I need God to give me strength cause I'm not doing to good. I'm just reaping to myself over and over....God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs God better than drugs
Who, his parents or someone else? Was he addicted to drugs? I ask because I know some people who used that crutch and it worked, others it didn't. Hey if it works for him more power to him, to be honest it bothers me as well Pokey, I hate it when someone is constantly reciting god is this god is that. Hey you ain't converting me so don't try. My sister found god, after she married a NC preacher, WTF her face book page is full of God this, god that. I rarely talk to her anymore because she does that, hey it works for you, don't cram that crap down my throat, I don't want to hear it. But he is the last in a long line of men she has been with and at least she quit the drugs and drinking, alcoholism is hereditary and dad was bad.
Try and let it go if it works for him, but remember the crutch is just that, if the crutch brakes or he has a relapse then god isn't so good for him now is it. He may need a different kind of rehab, think throw him in a cabin in the woods in the middle of nowhere and make him survive on his own for three months. Go visit every few days to make sure he is OK and bring him food and anything he needs.
I went to AA 30+ years ago, got my 30 day coin and had to leave because of the god crap, was sober for 30 years, not a drop to drink, but my crutch was pot. My higher power so to speak, little did I know I was using pot as a medication just like suboxin or methadone. Hey it worked until my heart surgeon recommended 3 beers a week to help thin my blood. And I have also found since my opioids scrip's are so high it also acts as a laxative to keep me regular and works quite well as long as I only have 1 a night, more and I get the runs, less and I end up one day with rocks for turds and the next the runs.
Find him another locked rehab place if you can that will not throw him out if he trips up, hell he should never have let him out. I just realized it may have been and most likely was the rehab who did the god thing to him, most rehabs do.
Good luck buddy, if you need someone to talk to him from his side of the table, been there done that, I would be happy to. Hey I ain't the best at teaching anyone anything hell my oldest is hooked on heroin but I never knew it until late last year for sure, I thought it was meth, even told her she looked like a meth addict but she just blamed it on her stepmom, Melanie because when she was with us she tried to get her to lose weight in jr high school, she was getting fatter and fatter and had no respect for herself because of it.
There are a lot of reasons for a kid to get hooked on hard drugs in her case it was her ex-husband. For your friend it could be anything. But being who you are I don't think you want to give up on this kid, I don't want to give up on mine but she refuses to come home and go into a 90 day rehab, locked facility. Hey she can have visitors, what more does she need.
Any way good luck dude, you got your hands full. Check out the next rehab a little better, maybe see if you can sit in on a couple of open sessions like AA used to have, everyday was an open meeting, anyone can come in, but Saturday night live, what we called it was for the hard core drunks like me, only members allowed and with good reason, we were more open about wanting to run over the jerk who just walked in front of me that night on the way to the meeting. A lot of cursing and language not fit for a truck driver. (Forgive me Fats and all the other truck drivers here) Raw would be an understatement.
Been that way myself most of my life. I can't say it's hurt me much.
No problem with God in ya. But it is coming out of him that is getting me! LOL
It been a good day. I'm tired mostly. Not a lot of sleep the past two days. But the kid is happy and he been busy all day. He got a little chub on his cheeks and no longer so horribly skinny.
We are going to work on the truck all day tomorrow and after the rebuilt carb goes on we will go for a ride. Truck has ten year old tires that look new but have cracks . Probably go down to the docks and see if he can't burn those tires off those duelly's a bit. Then he can put the new wheels and tires on it after.
He doesn't know we been building the truck for him.
Six months ago he wanted to go to Solvang for a job. I told him he had a better chance at a job holding a homeless sign. So ....He thought this was hilarious.
He doing ok. He isn't sleeping much. He worked really hard today and worked the horse pretty hard so by the end of the day it looked like he was going to drop. Trying not to push him too hard. It isn't like I'm yelling at him to do this or that he is getting me out of bed asking what to do.
We went down to the shop today and I got my partner to agree to train him on one of our wreckers. So tomorrow he is doing three hours of training on the small tow truck. I told him as long as John ok's him for actual solo rescues after his court date I'll let him work. He'll be able to bring a wrecker or a flatbed slider home and do emergency on calls.
I'm just praying we get to May 5th clean and the judge cuts him some slack. So that's it. Hopefully in a year I'll have something good to write here. C ya then.
