Just Proclaim Your Self As God
HOW TO MAKE YOUR OWN CULT 101
INTRODUCTION
WANT unlimited wealth - no taxes to pay - little or no government supervision? Simple! Proclaim yourself God and start your own cult. It is easier than you may think. No Spiritual training or knowledge is required. Just follow these easy to understand step by step instructions and you will be on your way to becoming a tax free multi-millionaire with private jets, yachts and secret getaways all over the world.


GETTING STARTED

Your first step is to proclaim yourself God. Or, if that is too ambitious, try something like "Supreme Spiritual Master" or "Reincarnation of a Past Prophet" or whatever. Just make it sound super great and powerful. You might want to make up a previously unknown title for yourself so you can get a copyright on it and sue anyone who talks bad about you.

Most people just copy stuff from someone else. Paul Twitchell just went to the local library, checked out almost anything, and then copied a paragraph from each separate book word for word and made a new book claiming it was his own work. He explained lack of continuity by saying that you could not understand his great wisdom because you were not spiritually advanced enough. Since plagiarism is common, the people you copy from are not likely to complain because they most likely copied their stuff from someone else also.

Next, you need to start a small following which you will gradually grow into a worldwide cult. In practice, this process usually takes longer than a single lifetime. So, your best formula is to use your cult as a family business like the Singh family does. One member of the family plays the part of "god" and all of the other family members support him and benefit financially.

You are going to need to do a little leg work to attract and hold a small core following. You will need to hold small meetings and keep spouting trash until you find a few suckers that will follow you around and believe you are some super master. It may take a while to get started but things will exponentially pick up as time goes on.

You need to understand and master the basic con game practiced by essentially all cults. Some key points to remember are:

1. I am a master and you are not. You can never equal my super powers. You are inferior, a sinner, a worthless person, etc. NEVER ADMIT MISTAKES. It is a sign of weakness.

2. Have an explanation for everything - even if it is illogical. People in cults gradually lose the capacity to do critical thinking and will accept most anything as true.

3. If you need to change a policy, say that the "new policy" has "always existed" and there never was an "old policy". People will believe a lie if it is repeated often enough. It is a basic principle of brainwashing.

4. "Treat a whore like a lady and a lady like a whore". Your followers are "ladies". They are honest but naive. You are going to rape them and not only steal their money but also ruin any chance they may have for legitimate Spiritual development. For some reason, if you treat them like trash, they will be more likely to remain as your followers. It works for Gurinder.

You need an information control system where all information passes thru you so you can control knowledge. Knowledge is power. The cult members must only be allowed the bare minimum of knowledge about your cult. Make it hard for them to learn the identity of other members so they do not start "comparing notes" which could allow them to uncover the real truth. All orders come from you. You appoint all in positions of authority. Everyone "serves" at your pleasure.

Eventually, you may need to set up some kind of damage control system. For example, if someone catches you in a hot tub with naked girls doing cocaine it could ruin your reputation as a "holy" person.

MAINTENANCE
Having taken all the necessary steps to set up a viable cult, you and your relatives can now relax and just watch the tax free money roll in. Delegate any remaining jobs and just let the system run on "automatic pilot". Tell followers you are "off talking with god" or any story you want to make up. Representatives can do all the leg work now. You don't even have to be seen any more. Just say you are "watching everything from an invisible plane" or some such crap. The fools that follow you will recruit more fools and your cult and bank account will continue to grow.

quote Originally posted by MidEngineManiac:You need to understand and master the basic con game practiced by essentially all cults. Some key points to remember are: 1. I am a master and you are not. You can never equal my super powers. You are inferior, a sinner, a worthless person, etc. NEVER ADMIT MISTAKES. It is a sign of weakness. 2. Have an explanation for everything - even if it is illogical. People in cults gradually lose the capacity to do critical thinking and will accept most anything as true. 3. If you need to change a policy, say that the "new policy" has "always existed" and there never was an "old policy". People will believe a lie if it is repeated often enough. It is a basic principle of brainwashing. 4. "Treat a whore like a lady and a lady like a whore". Your followers are "ladies". They are honest but naive. You are going to rape them and not only steal their money but also ruin any chance they may have for legitimate Spiritual development. For some reason, if you treat them like trash, they will be more likely to remain as your followers. It works for Gurinder.

Are you still talking religion, or politics?
Oh, wait - nevermind.

I thought this looked like "How To Succeed In Business" A lot of good advice from upper management types. They all seem to think they're God.

[This message has been edited by Zeb (edited 07-17-2014).]