ALL NEW - Parts not interchangeable with previous design
FIELD-TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment
YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one that works
FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does
MAINTENANCE-FREE - Impossible to fix
RE-DESIGNED - Previous faults corrected, we hope...
HAND-CRAFTED - Assembly machines operated without gloves on
PERFORMANCE PROVEN - Will operate through the warranty period
MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours
HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it
UNPRECEDENTED PERFORMANCE - Nothing we ever had before worked THIS way
BUILT TO PRECISION TOLERANCES - We finally got it to fit together
SATISFACTION GUARANTEED - Manufacturer's, upon cashing your check
MICROPROCESSOR CONTROLLED - Does things we can't explain
RESULTS ARE PROMISING: Turned power on and no smoke detected -- this time...
LATEST AEROSPACE TECHNOLOGY - One of our techs was laid off by Boeing
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Its not always about who gets to the finish line first, its who looks good when they get there. 'Course it doesnt hurt to have both.
FYI - Im forgetful so if you PM me and I dont get back to you, please remind me.
