So as most of you know last month I was laid off. I got a new job (yay) but things are still a little messy. I had to borrow money from people to pay my bills when I was unexpectedly laid off. Well with my getting my new job, it means my unemployment is stopped. I had all my bills planned out and payment plans in place for things that needed to be paid asap. My new job holds the first check so I'm not going to be getting paid for another 2 weeks. I called my parents to see if they could lend me just enough to pay my rent and car payment until I get paid and then I can give them the money I was originally going to use to pay the bills to begin with.
BOTH my parents yelled at me that I'm living a lifestyle I can't afford and that they refuse to help me. Don't take this the wrong way, they have helped me before. My mom lent me $300 last month to help me pay my bills. My dad is currently laid off as well so he's not too well off. What really makes me angry though is the fact that they're telling me "you cant afford your lifestyle". I've been affording my lifestyle since June. I **NEVER** asked any of them for help until I was laid off. I always paid my bills on time, and still had money to go out and enjoy life with my friends.
It's not like I went out and blew my money on shoes or clothes or something stupid. As soon as I was laid off I stopped going to my karate classes cause I didn't want to spend the extra money on the classes, even though my karate helps keep my mind straight. I WAS F'N LAID OFF!! So now I'm stuck with trying to come up with $400 by the 15th so I can pay rent, or I'm out on the street. I have $15 to my name as of now, and that has to last me another 2 weeks.
I have no credit so no financial institution will give me a loan... I'm so screwed I just needed to vent somewhere... Any ideas are greatly appreciated... and don't anyone say "Why not be a stripped or prostitue or phone $ex operator cause I absolutely REFUSE to degrade myself like that. I used to hate myself so much that I considered having $ex for money, and now that I finally broke that frame of mind I refuse to go back to it...
Get roommates, ride the bus, and when all else fails, cry (really) to daddy/mommy/grammy/pappy. Sorry if it seems short & harsh, but you're experiencing what every young adult experiences (needs to experience) about the realities of life. Been there, done that. Walked a mile in those shoes. Threw the stones in the glass house.
IP: Logged
01:32 PM
ryan.hess Member
Posts: 20784 From: Orlando, FL Registered: Dec 2002
Pros: -You can get loans to pay for it and everything else you need(food, gas, rent, etc) -Loans are low interest (3%?) -You'll get more money from working after you graduate
Cons: -It's harder than "working" -You have a short amount of time after graduating before you have to start paying back your loans
IP: Logged
01:43 PM
Hank is Here Member
Posts: 4461 From: Hershey, Pa Registered: Sep 2000
Pros: -You can get loans to pay for it and everything else you need(food, gas, rent, etc) -Loans are low interest (3%?) -You'll get more money from working after you graduate
Cons: -It's harder than "working" -You have a short amount of time after graduating before you have to start paying back your loans
I've already been to college, have my degree, but thanks for your help...
IP: Logged
02:21 PM
ryan.hess Member
Posts: 20784 From: Orlando, FL Registered: Dec 2002
If you have something that has some worth (ie car), you could try and get a short term loan from a bank, and used said car as collateral. If you don't pay, they take away your car tho.
I do have a car but I'm currently making payments on that as well. I went to the bank today to check out about a loan, they said 24-48 hrs until I hear if I was approved or not. I really doubt I will be. I had ruined my credit as soon as I turned 18 by being stupid with a credit card. The only thing I have helping me build up my credit now is my car payment. All I can do is sit back and hope and pray...
IP: Logged
02:38 PM
Patrick Member
Posts: 38655 From: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada Registered: Apr 99
I **NEVER** asked any of them for help until I was laid off. I always paid my bills on time, and still had money to go out and enjoy life with my friends.
It's not like I went out and blew my money on shoes or clothes or something stupid...
And how much money from each paycheck were you putting away for a rainy day?
I realize there's nothing glamorous or fun about saving money, but having some money stashed away for times like this is an absolute necessity.
IP: Logged
02:47 PM
rogergarrison Member
Posts: 49601 From: A Western Caribbean Island/ Columbus, Ohio Registered: Apr 99
If your already in trouble...DONT get a loan or credit card. Just pay what you can when you can. When Ive gotten unemployment, I 'fudged' a few weeks so I got money from them till I had a paycheck again. They make you wait like 6 weeks before they give it to you dont they? If your good and dont do drugs, you can sell blood. Its not much, but it helps. Anyone you know need something you can do for them for more money. Like painting in their house, watching their kids, walking neighbors dogs, If its warm, you can detail peoples cars for them....they buy the stuff...you do the labor. Places here get $150 @ car to wax it, shampoo interior and clean all the glass in and out. (and they dont do that good of a job either). If you get desperate, you can always make a phorno movie, lol (j/k)
I dont really have much advice to give you that you haven't already heard. I wish there was some way I could help you, but my situation isn't much better. I feel so bad because you helped me when I was in MI and now I can't help you! But do what everyone else said, see if theres someone you can help for some cash, talk to your land lord and just tell them the situation, unless its like a management company that owns your place, private people are much easier to deal with. Goodluck girlie! Take care!
btw...let me know about the hotel thing if you need anything!
IP: Logged
08:04 PM
PFF
System Bot
Hank is Here Member
Posts: 4461 From: Hershey, Pa Registered: Sep 2000
Possibly try finding a live in nanny type of position? You could get free housing and possibly a few bucks to boot. Just trying to shoot out creative ideas
IP: Logged
08:16 PM
Jaygee79 Member
Posts: 4259 From: Dartmouth, MA Registered: Mar 2000
If I had it to loan to you, I would....Did you try talking to your landlord? Explain the situation to him, maybe he'll let you pay it 2 weeks late. He may let you give him a post dated check if you can give him a definite date on when you'll have the money. Trust me, I know how parents can be. Just because you have no credit doesn't mean you can't get a credit card or loan. You should try. You might be surprised, especially if you've been keeping up with all your payments and everything for awhile. As a last option, you could always try pawning some things, then when you get your check you can go buy them back. I've never done that though, so I don't really know how it works.
IP: Logged
11:01 PM
Jennies88gT Member
Posts: 79 From: hellertown,pa,usa Registered: Dec 2004
Spring if you even get in that kind of trouble just remeber i may not be able to help out finacially, but as a freind watch out i know where u live.....i'm always here for you even though i'm going through some rough stuff of my own i can still help a friend out just please don't go doing anything stupid call me or get ahold of me on here
I got mostly everything sorted out... all I need to come up with is $40 for gas for the next 2 weeks... any ideas how to get $40 real quick? I only have 1/2 a tank left.... :\
IP: Logged
11:55 PM
Jan 12th, 2005
Jaygee79 Member
Posts: 4259 From: Dartmouth, MA Registered: Mar 2000
Go to the cash advance place on lehigh st. bring your last two active checking account statements,and a major bill with your name on it or the western union places i always go to the on on american parkway in allentown write a check they will cash it for you just make sure as soon as u get paid to put the money back into your checking account they don't take it out of your account for at least two weeksi don't do it all the time but as a last resort it works it's right by all the clubs there i think its the parkway, where banana joes is and the sterling check it out
Anyone know of any place in the Allentown PA area that will pay me for giving blood? I can't find anywhere. I called the hospital and they said miller memorial but I dont think they pay... help... im desperate...
IP: Logged
11:59 AM
Paul Prince Member
Posts: 2935 From: Kansas City, MO Registered: Dec 2002
Just curious, but how do you go from being desperate to posting an aquarium thread later in the day?..........Paul
Pretty easy actually.... I was upset yesterday so he came over and took me out trying to cheer me up. I got to choose some fish to put in his tank, but while we were at the store we didnt see any decorations that we liked so when we got back to his house I posted a thread on here. I'm glad he cares about me and is understanding, something I get the impression that you're not. But thats just judging by your nasty reply. Thanks for the help....
the lifestyle thing your parents are yelling about is: until some major corporation hands you an employment contract for a fixed number of years at a fixed salary
you will have to deal with things like a job loss, illness, having your house burn down....
no matter what, you should be putting 10% of your income into some type of investment where it will:
1. earn more income all by itself and 2. be accessable incase something bad happens
on top of that, any extra money you make on the side should go into the same fund.
do you want to work for someone else for the rest of your life?
its easy to be wealthy:
have more than you show make more than you owe say less than you know
thats the lifestyle your parents are talking about - you want to be in a position where your friends and family come to YOU for help when they are in trouble. :^)
PS. I know its easy to rationalize and say "great idea, as soon as I get out of college, or get a better job, or after the 2nd kid is born...."
its a mindset - its a way of life - you are either putting some of your money to work for you, or your not - there is no 'later'
[This message has been edited by Ken Wittlief (edited 01-12-2005).]
IP: Logged
12:39 PM
PFF
System Bot
Jennies88gT Member
Posts: 79 From: hellertown,pa,usa Registered: Dec 2004
I got mostly everything sorted out... all I need to come up with is $40 for gas for the next 2 weeks... any ideas how to get $40 real quick? I only have 1/2 a tank left.... :\
If your friend has enough money to buy a fancy fishtank ask him to borrow 40 bucks till you get paid.....i'd tell you were to donate blood in allentown but i see that my ideas and gereral concern for you as a friend wanting to help aren't good enough and ken that is a very good post
IP: Logged
01:36 PM
pokeyfiero Member
Posts: 16233 From: Free America! Registered: Dec 2003
I find it difficult to see your situation from where I sit.I happen to be broke right now and without a job but I can't understand how you don't have anyone that can loan you some money. I spent about thirty thousand more than I had this year so I'm screwed for a couple months but If I needed some cash I would borrow it from a friend. Have you not built a reputation good enough yet to borrow money? No matter what your situation is now make sure you never sully your name and always be dependable it will pay when you need it most. Or do you just have friends that are as broke as you?
Short term solutions. 1.Go to the home depot paint department and look for someone doing a large painting project.Ask if you could help them with their job for a very reasonable amount.No shame in looking for work and if you tell people what it is you are doing they usaully respect that and admire your willingness to do what it takes.I bet you could even work it around your normal work schedule and in the future it could be a great resource for extra cash.Did you know that most bankrupsys could have been avoided if the household had and additional 150 bucks per month. 2. Cash advance on your paycheck.several vultures out there these days that do this.I would rather see you pick up a side job or two but in a emergency you do what you got to do. 3.Whats wrong with making a buck or two with the phone sex thing. lol 4.If you're against selling your body maybe sell some unneeded stuff at a pawn shop.If you had more time I would say E BAy but I believe you had to have the money by the 15th. 5.Ask your landlord if there is any work you could do for him to sort of help you both out.Win/win situations are always good. 6.For the future get yourself a credit card for emergencys.Don't use it unless you can pay it off that month,meaning you didn't need to use it anyway.It is good to keep a small balance with payments showing on time every month. 7.Also for future use.If you borrow from a friend pay that back before anything else.Don't make them ask for it.If you get some money pay them a large portion of it even if it isn't even due yet.
Good luck and remember it only gets harder so learn while it is easy.
------------------ There are three kinds of people Those trying to be good. Those trying not to be bad. And those that make trying not to be bad a lot harder for me!!! PLAY HARD-DIE FAST
IP: Logged
02:51 PM
Patrick Member
Posts: 38655 From: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada Registered: Apr 99
But he doesn't care enough about you to lend you 40 bucks?
I dunno, something doesn't seem quite kosher here.
On the contrary, he paid my rent for me. So rather than $40, he lent me $400. Also he lent me $150 back at christmas time so I could get gifts for my family because he didnt want me to go to their houses with nothing. Are you always this paranoid? Or just on the net?
IP: Logged
10:39 PM
Jaygee79 Member
Posts: 4259 From: Dartmouth, MA Registered: Mar 2000
I noticed you’ve been quite selective with what and who you’ve responded to in this thread. Could it be that some of the questions directed your way have touched a nerve?
Possibly your parents’ opinion of your lifestyle isn’t that far off the mark.
I noticed you’ve been quite selective with what and who you’ve responded to in this thread. Could it be that some of the questions directed your way have touched a nerve?
Possibly your parents’ opinion of your lifestyle isn’t that far off the mark.
I've done my best to try to respond to everyone in some way. Maybe not in the thread, but a few people have gotten PM's. The only thing that touched a nerve is people jumping to conclusions such as you...
IP: Logged
06:16 AM
Patrick Member
Posts: 38655 From: Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada Registered: Apr 99
I'm 24, My younger brother, 21, is living with me totally free of charge. I pay everything except his personal bills(car insurance, etc). He works a full time job and has somehow run up a $500 tab ON ME! Yes, he's paid it down to $340, but I don't understand how he does it. A friend commented the other week: "I can tell when your brother gets paid...he's never home." Its the truth, boy knows how to spend, but I don't think he's got a dime when its gone, I don't think he's even got a savings acct. Only reason I let him live with me for free is that he is going to college.
Just an observation. How many people have similar habits as his? I don't know. I have always lived by the rule that people themselves determine what happens to them. Just like the robber in Roger's thread. I don't feel sorry for him in the least, he knew the risks he was taking. Marrilow, you knew the risks you were taking by not saving for situations such as this. Just an observation.
IP: Logged
05:17 PM
avengador1 Member
Posts: 35468 From: Orlando, Florida Registered: Oct 2001
When I was single, I would just keep enough money for gas and lunch. The rest of my paycheck went straight into my savings account. I'm not ahamed to admit that I lived with my parents as long as I could and managed to save a good chunk of money. I actually paid for my own college education with the money I saved. To this day I only keep about $30 out of my paycheck and the rest goes into my savings. Now i have a mortgage and property taxes to pay, but I still have enough money left over to save for my son's college fund. I also have enough to go out on weekends with the family if we choose to do so. I guess the point I am trying to make is that you need to learn how to budget your money and stick to it. You shouldn't have to live paycheck to paycheck with no reserves in case of an emergency. You also are going to find out that you need to start building a credit history. You will need it later in life when you want to make a big ticket item purchase. Make a plan and stick to it.
IP: Logged
10:09 PM
PFF
System Bot
Hank is Here Member
Posts: 4461 From: Hershey, Pa Registered: Sep 2000
When I was single, I would just keep enough money for gas and lunch. The rest of my paycheck went straight into my savings account. I'm not ahamed to admit that I lived with my parents as long as I could and managed to save a good chunk of money. I actually paid for my own college education with the money I saved. To this day I only keep about $30 out of my paycheck and the rest goes into my savings. Now i have a mortgage and property taxes to pay, but I still have enough money left over to save for my son's college fund. I also have enough to go out on weekends with the family if we choose to do so. I guess the point I am trying to make is that you need to learn how to budget your money and stick to it. You shouldn't have to live paycheck to paycheck with no reserves in case of an emergency. You also are going to find out that you need to start building a credit history. You will need it later in life when you want to make a big ticket item purchase. Make a plan and stick to it.
I live simliar to avengador1 did. I live like I make $7.15 an hour and still live at home, that is my habit and I stick to it! This lets me be ready for anything that comes across my path...ie emergancy, cars I like, or possibly buying a house if the right one appears.
I also believe not only do you control your wealth with the money you make, but also you control your carrear/job by what you do at work and your drive. If you are happy with crappy jobs you'll work at 7/11 the rest of your life, if you always want more work and broaden your goals you almost always will go up.
IP: Logged
10:28 PM
iced_theater Member
Posts: 1755 From: Green River, Wyoming, United States Registered: Jun 2003
I'm currently doing what the avangador and hank have done. Except I'm currently saving for a car, then I'll most likely save for a house. I've already had to use some of my money to pay for a surgery I had last year.
I generally live like Hank does, but I have wasted my fair share of money. Marrilow you put yourself in this situation. First thing you should do when you get a check is take 10% and forget it is there. I have lived check to check, still do sometimes, but if something comes up I have cash to cover it. It is fine if you budget yourself to $0 every month aslong as in that budget you have savings.
Before you were laid off did you go out to eat? Could you have cut back on that and saved $5 a week. How about a movie? Even if you had only save $20 a week from your paychecks, it would have covered you from a problem like this. Cut back on things.
If you are struggling sell whatever kind of car you have and get a cheaper one. Dont spend as much on going out to eat. Get rid of non-essintails. Internet, home phone service, cable, satellite, cellular phones. When you go home dont watch TV it will save on electricity. Infact instead of going home go to the library get a newspaper and check the help wanted ads.
I wish you luck in life, but your parents probably know you better than anyone else, and were not to far off I imagine.
Lonzo
IP: Logged
11:54 PM
Jan 14th, 2005
ditch Member
Posts: 3780 From: Brookston, IN Registered: Mar 2003
Just an observation and a suggestion, maybe not what you want to hear
Apparently you didn't have any savings before you were laid off? If you did it was obviously very little. When you get back on your feet try putting some money away every paycheck. Maybe that money you were spending on the Karate class. Even if you put $20 a week in savings it can add up to enough that you will have something to fall back on should you be unemployeed for a couple weeks.
It looks like your parents don't want to give you anymore money since your mom already gave you $300 last month. You said your dad is currently laid off too. Money is tight for them, they give you $300 last month, now you ask for more money. I can see why they may have been a bit pissed. Maybe they're just tired of you coming to them everytime you need money.
You may have been affording your lifestyle since June (7 months, not very long at all), but apparently you weren't thinking about saving money for times like this. I guarantee this is what your parents are trying to get at. You need to do more than afford your lifestyle. You also need to think about the future. Try to be ready for the unexpected....ie, put money away in savings every check. If you had been doing that since June you would most likely not be in this predicament. Heck, all you would have had to do is save about $500 from June until you were laid off in December (6 months) and this whole thing would be much easier. Saving $500 in a 6 month period....you know you can do that.
If you honestly can say it wouldn't have been possible to save $500 over that 6 month period up to this layoff, then your parents were right, you can't afford your lifestyle.