Okay like the phrase....You can't have your cake and eat it too. WTH not?!?! Its MY cake! If I want some of MY cake then why can't I have it?!

Are there anymore of these silly things that you all can think of?

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God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannont change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

AIM: Sarabeara965
Email: Sarabear@gmail.com

"have" in the sense of "I have a car" or "I have a pencil", not in the sense of "I'm going to have a sandwich!" ie possession, not consumption.

If you eat the cake (consume it), it's gone. Hence you cannot possess it and also have eaten it.

* * *

My stupid phrase:

"Can I ask you a question?"

Why ask permission to ask a question? By asking permission you're asking a question. What if the answer is "no"? You've already asked a question! So I always answer "no" when someone asks me if they can ask something.

Ed

There is a reason "you can't have your cake and eat it too" is silly. That one somehow got changed from the original. I think the ACTUAL saying is "you can't eat your cake and have it, too". Meaning if you want a beautiful cake around to look at, then you can't eat it (or obviously it will be gone). It is supposed to be a phrase about not being able to have it both ways.

Good one, edhering.

My stupid phrase is: "Can I borrow a kleenex?" No. You can KEEP it, but you can't BORROW it because I don't really want it back.

Whats with ..
"A bird in hand is worth two in the bush"

quote Originally posted by 84Bill: Whats with .. "A bird in hand is worth two in the bush"

I can think of a couple other animals...

"A bird in hand is worth two in the bush"

Translation: a smaller amout of possessed thingie is better then a larger abount of thingie not in possesion.

"on the one hand..."
"on the other hand..."

(looking at my hands)
(shrug)

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"________ is the spittin' image of ________"

If my photos spat at me, they'd get tossed in the garbage pronto.

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"up the creek without a paddle"

If you're wading through the creek, there's no need for a paddle (unless you're chasing your misbehaving kid).

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"nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs"

If the chairs aren't rocking, no worries. Besides, cats have a habit of jumping in chairs and curling up to go to sleep. Again, no worries.

quote Originally posted by FieroRumor: "A bird in hand is worth two in the bush" Translation: a smaller amout of possessed thingie is better then a larger abount of thingie not in possesion.

Oh... ok that explains it.

But why would anyone want a thingie in their hand let alone two more thingies roaming around the bush all willie nillie?

quote Originally posted by 84Bill: Oh... ok that explains it. But why would anyone want a thingie in their hand let alone two more thingies roaming around the bush all willie nillie?

i don't see anything wrong with that

"That's neither here nor there."

Then it must not exist.

"I put 2 and 2 together"... well, no, you put 1 and 1 together... usually..

Or, "Wanna know something" or "Guess what I did", and then they insert no space for me to answer..

What about the phrase "as it were"? As what were what?

Or when people insert the word "why" as a conjunction. "If I went there, why, I'm sure I'd like it." Why what? You're asking me?

[This message has been edited by fierobear (edited 07-28-2004).]

"What’s the good word?" Old people use it on me a lot. WTF am I supposed to say to that?

"All of a sudden..."

* What would part of a sudden be?

* Why just one sudden? If you used all of one, why not get more?

* What's a sudden, anyway?

How did people start saying that phrase instead of just "Suddenly..."?

up the creek without a paddle"

If you're wading through the creek, there's no need for a paddle (unless you're chasing your misbehaving kid).

I actually laughed out loud on this one!!

I thought " the sh!t is going to hit the fan " was funny but I have revised it lately to...
"oh boy you might as well just pick up your sh!t and throw it at the fan!

How about 'military intelligence', 'jumbo shrimp', 'new Fiero'. Nope they're oxymorons. Thanks to George Carlin for the first two.

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Notchbacks RULE

"It's cool to have a car you just have to look back at."

quote Originally posted by Fierobruiser: Notchbacks RULE

How about that? Notchbacks rule what?

What about the time period 'now'? How can someone say something like, "Come over here right now!"? As soon as that is said 'now' has past. It is not possibe to do something 'now'.

"More fun than you can shake a stick at"

What the heck is that supposed to mean???

"Hot water heater"
Useless. Hot water doesn't need heating.

Here's one I use a little too frequently:
"Whatcha know?"
A stupid question, really. "Well... I know that peas are green. I know that the capital of Georgia is Atlanta. I know that the square root of 81 is 9. I know... etc."
A correct answer could take a while.

When you try to help someone maneuver a trailer and you yell GO AHEAD BACKUP.always get a confussed look.

or gallieger ....Apartments souldn't they be called togetherments? Why are they called buildings when they are done? They should be called builts!

quote Originally posted by Raydar: Here's one I use a little too frequently: "Whatcha know?"

Or similarly, "What's up?"

birds, clouds, planes, the ceiling...

"What’s the good word?"
-Tell me some good news, or I hope you're bringing good news, not bad.

"on the one hand..."
"on the other hand..."
-One point of view is __________. Another point of view is ___________.

"up the creek without a paddle"
-You're in trouble, because you have no control over the situation. (This is assuming you're in a canoe. Not many people use a paddle while wading)

"A bird in hand is worth two in the bush"
-A small amount of something that you have is better than a large amount of something that you don't have. i.e. It's better to have $10 than be promised $20.

"That's neither here nor there."
-That has nothing to do with this discussion.

Notchbacks rule what?
-Notchbacks rule. Period. Meaning notchbacks rule over ALL. (especially Formulas)

"More fun than you can shake a stick at"
-I have no bloody clue. I know it means it's a lot of fun, but where this came from? No idea.

Altho I got this from an old ep of SNL, it's still funny.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." What are they talking about? You can't cross a bridge before you get to it! I don't care how fast you're going.

* * *

And it occurred to me:

"And then do you know what happened?" What? YOU are telling ME a story and you expect ME to know what happened next?

* * *

Why does the sign say "TCBY Yogurt"? I was under the impression that the Y in the acronym was for "Yogurt", ie "The Country's Best Yogurt"--so what they're actually saying is "The Country's Best Yogurt Yogurt"! WTF??? www. .com!!!

* * *

Oh! What really annoys me: "Do you have the correct time?" NO DIPSTICK I HAVE THE INCORRECT TIME!!!! How the hell am I supposed to know how accurate my watch is? Am I carrying an atomic clock around with me and didn't know it??? If you're going to annoy me by asking me what time it is, at least do so without arrogantly presuming that I might not have something APPROXIMATING the correct time!

* * *

I love to do tirades...

Ed

Heck is a place where you go if you dont believe in Gosh

quote Originally posted by mattm: "More fun than you can shake a stick at" What the heck is that supposed to mean???

Well in my little perverted world....shaking a stick sounds like fun!! hahaaha

Omg I can't belive I just went there.....lol

quote Originally posted by Lex: "What’s the good word?" Old people use it on me a lot. WTF am I supposed to say to that?

they don't want to hear any smack.
kinda like if you don't have anything good to say shut the hell up.Or something close to that.

quote Originally posted by G-Nasty: Heck is a place where you go if you dont believe in Gosh

Heh heh. Good one.

I always thought that Heck was a place you were sent if you weren't bad enough to go to Hell. It's not as bad as Hell, it's just *really* boring.

whats the correct time? I've never heard that in my entire life.. Maybe you grew up around a bunch of dumbasses who felt the need to clarify? "Could you tell me the correct answer to the this question?"

On another note though, someone mentioned oxymorons.. "New Fiero"?

ATM Machine
PIN Number
VIN Number (EBAY those morons)
Are you still here?
When someone uses "O" the letter, instead of "0" the number. Example 912-559o, 7316o, 9o21o
Irregardless
Can you tell me how to get to the Walmarts?

When I hear those things I just want to kill that person.

[This message has been edited by ls3mach (edited 07-29-2004).]

"Where'd you come from?"

I've answered my home phone to: "Where you at?" Well, you called me, you should know.

"More fun than a sack full of hammers."

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Marty,
'84 SE, '85 2M4, '86 SE, '87 GT, '88 GT

quote Originally posted by ls3mach: ATM Machine PIN Number VIN Number (EBAY those morons)

All brought to you by the department of redundancy department.

Here's a couple more...

Dumb as a box of rocks.
Deaf as a post.
Uglier than a sack of dicks. (I swear I've heard it. Just not frequently. Thankfully.)
<steps back, out of Sara's way... >

[This message has been edited by Raydar (edited 07-29-2004).]

Some phrases I frequently hear in the office:

"At this moment in time"
"to be honest"
"with all due respect"
"I hear what you are saying"
"at the end of the day"

and my favourite this week was when our big boss man told our whole dept that "we don't want to eat our own lunch"....I have no idea where that little gem sprung from, or indeed what on earth he was on about!

Cheers
PK

quote Originally posted by edhering: "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." What are they talking about? You can't cross a bridge before you get to it! I don't care how fast you're going. * * *

That's exactly what it means. You can't cross a bridge before you get to it. It means you'll deal with a certain siutation when the time comes.
example: You're unemployed and looking for a job. What will you wear to work on your 1st day of work? Well, you'll need to get hired and find out what the job is first, so cross that bridge when you get to it.

How about the difference between FLAMMABLE and INFLAMMABLE...

Also, used to work with a guy from Arkansas... I'd say, "How you feeling?"

He'd say, "Finer than a frogs hair split 4 ways"

Or my all-time favorite:

Wife: How much do you love me?

Husband: "About as much as a jackal loves a carcass... Is that enough love for ya' babe?"

[This message has been edited by fourfoot23 (edited 07-29-2004).]