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Lying Contest by cliffw
Started on: 09-01-2006 02:21 PM
Replies: 95
Last post by: Toddster on 09-18-2006 06:34 PM
blakeinspace
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Report this Post09-07-2006 11:03 AM Click Here to See the Profile for blakeinspaceClick Here to Email blakeinspaceSend a Private Message to blakeinspaceDirect Link to This Post
Toddster is a Democrat.
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FieroOilAnalyst
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Report this Post09-07-2006 01:49 PM Click Here to See the Profile for FieroOilAnalystClick Here to visit FieroOilAnalyst's HomePageClick Here to Email FieroOilAnalystSend a Private Message to FieroOilAnalystDirect Link to This Post
I love my Jeep.

I would never trade my Jeep for a Fiero.

I'm going to drive my Jeep anywhere...better yet, I'm going to start my Jeep and listen to it run perfectly after sinking nearly $2500 into it.

Jeeps that run like crap and are stuck in Home Depot parking lots RULE!!
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OHNIKO
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Report this Post09-07-2006 03:02 PM Click Here to See the Profile for OHNIKOClick Here to Email OHNIKOSend a Private Message to OHNIKODirect Link to This Post
I lie like a rug.

I pee like a woman.

I always ask for directions.

I don't like sex.

What am I?
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SC Coupe
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Report this Post09-08-2006 10:14 PM Click Here to See the Profile for SC CoupeClick Here to visit SC Coupe's HomePageClick Here to Email SC CoupeSend a Private Message to SC CoupeDirect Link to This Post
“The British Government has learned that Saddam Hussein recently sought significant quantities of uranium from Africa .”
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SC Coupe
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Report this Post09-08-2006 10:16 PM Click Here to See the Profile for SC CoupeClick Here to visit SC Coupe's HomePageClick Here to Email SC CoupeSend a Private Message to SC CoupeDirect Link to This Post

SC Coupe

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“Now, by the way, any time you hear the United States government talking about wiretap, it requires -- a wiretap requires a court order. Nothing has changed, by the way. When we're talking about chasing down terrorists, we're talking about getting a court order before we do so.”
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SC Coupe
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Report this Post09-08-2006 10:22 PM Click Here to See the Profile for SC CoupeClick Here to visit SC Coupe's HomePageClick Here to Email SC CoupeSend a Private Message to SC CoupeDirect Link to This Post
“there is no doubt that Saddam Hussein now has weapons of mass destruction.”
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Phaeton
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Report this Post09-09-2006 03:19 AM Click Here to See the Profile for PhaetonSend a Private Message to PhaetonDirect Link to This Post
boondawg:

ouch...it was NOT a quart...

Alaska has some of the best roads in the world, tailor made for racing back and forth from well spaced towns.

[This message has been edited by Phaeton (edited 09-09-2006).]

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sostock
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Report this Post09-09-2006 03:36 AM Click Here to See the Profile for sostockSend a Private Message to sostockDirect Link to This Post
"Mission Accomplished"

my wife love's my fiero and we fight over who gets to drive it.

the space shuttle will take off someday without any delays or problems.
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Wolfhound
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Report this Post09-09-2006 06:12 AM Click Here to See the Profile for WolfhoundClick Here to visit Wolfhound's HomePageClick Here to Email WolfhoundSend a Private Message to WolfhoundDirect Link to This Post
i cannot tell the truth

"Bill Clinton chopped down that cherry tree."
George W.
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fogglethorpe
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Report this Post09-09-2006 10:54 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fogglethorpeSend a Private Message to fogglethorpeDirect Link to This Post
The descendents of Ishmael will one day get along famously with the descendents of Isaac.
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Richjk21
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Report this Post09-09-2006 11:05 AM Click Here to See the Profile for Richjk21Send a Private Message to Richjk21Direct Link to This Post
 
quote
Originally posted by yosemitefieros:

I have been peed on by a Dolfin... Twice.


Hey ... What you and Dan Marino do behind the privacy of closed doors ......
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NEPTUNE
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Report this Post09-09-2006 12:31 PM Click Here to See the Profile for NEPTUNESend a Private Message to NEPTUNEDirect Link to This Post
Some would say we already have a winner. He was elected by a narrow margin in 2004.
Whether you like him or not, this joke's still funny:

The Lie Clock Joke:

This guy dies and finds his way to heaven.
As he stands in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, this guy sees a huge wall of clocks behind the saint.

The guy asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the guy, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's, said St. Peter. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Wow that's great. And where's President Bush's clock?" asked the man.

"President Bush's Lie-Clock is in Jesus' office.

He's using it as a ceiling fan."

[This message has been edited by NEPTUNE (edited 09-10-2006).]

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fogglethorpe
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Report this Post09-09-2006 07:02 PM Click Here to See the Profile for fogglethorpeSend a Private Message to fogglethorpeDirect Link to This Post
The Rolling Stones are are still a viable rock band.

------------------
Who is John Galt?

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Toddster
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Report this Post09-10-2006 11:57 AM Click Here to See the Profile for ToddsterClick Here to Email ToddsterSend a Private Message to ToddsterDirect Link to This Post
 
quote
Originally posted by blakeinspace:

Toddster is a Democrat.


Rats, I was going to say that.

OK, how about this:

true or false

1) I jumped out of a plane at 3000 feet and the parachute malfunctioned. I survived. I was too shook-up to jump the following week and stayed at home instead of going with the club. The plane crashed that weekend and 17 members of my club were killed.

2) On 9/11 my wife and I had tickets to fly on American Airlines to San Francisco from New York. We missed the flight.

3) I was driving a Fiero GT over a wet mountain road and lost control. I did a 360 spin without touching the concrete barrier on either side of the highway and as the car came out of the spin I just kept driving as if nothing happend.

4) One month after getting my open water diving certification I met Jaques Cousteau who invited me on a diving trip.

5) I once dated a woman who wanted to be married to a polygamist and asked if she could be my number one wife and help me choose the others.

Have fun guessing
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Raydar
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Report this Post09-10-2006 01:08 PM Click Here to See the Profile for RaydarClick Here to Email RaydarSend a Private Message to RaydarDirect Link to This Post
I paid $2.259 for gas, last night.

Todd. 1 & 3 are true.

[This message has been edited by Raydar (edited 09-10-2006).]

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Toddster
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Report this Post09-18-2006 06:34 PM Click Here to See the Profile for ToddsterClick Here to Email ToddsterSend a Private Message to ToddsterDirect Link to This Post
 
quote
Originally posted by Raydar:

I paid $2.259 for gas, last night.

Todd. 1 & 3 are true.



Correct. I guess I mentioned those before. how about 2, 4 & 5?
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