Is it bad that if my girlfriend told me to sell my Fiero or she was leaving I would keep the Fiero?

I love Katey but she does a much better job of pushing me away than my Fiero ever has, and believe me when I say it has tried. Incidently the reason she hates my car so much is cause it is where I go to feel safe and comfy after she finds something else wrong with me.

Women.

Ditch the chick! I wouldn't even let a girl finish the sentence before I'd be driving away in the car. =/

As much as I adore my girlfriend, the car is indeed my sanctuary like no other.

Really, if she's threatening to do that over a car, then it's not going to work out. It'll start with the car, then it'll be the way you dress, and the way you wear your hair. You're doomed no matter what you do!

Im really in no position to offer relationship advice, but I'll do it anyway. The key word you used was "girlfriend," and not "wife" or even fiancé. You need to look long and hard at your relationship and figure out why she's truly pushing you away. I feel like a man's car is women's oldest scapegoat for their own insecurities. Didn't you post a few pictures of her washing it not too long ago? Seems like the confusion is with herself and not you. Don't deal with any bull, though. Laying down this early in a relationship (early, because you're not engaged or married) is not an excellent strategy.

^ I agree 100%.

If you have to give up something that means something to you, what will she give up for you?

Biggest question is why should you either have to give up anything. That's what real relationships are about, not who's got the "power"....

My 2c ,do what you want, but that works for me.

Peace

Oops! what else is she trying to tell you???? Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with the "car"..... Better have a very frank discussion... all I gotta say.. Good luck!

[This message has been edited by Fierosmith (edited 07-22-2010).]

A man needs a hobby. But then, a man needs a good woman, too. If you are otherwise having a great relationship with her, consider changing to a hobby that would be more beneficial to the relationship. But discuss that with her first, as you might get to the root of her problem with Fieros, and it might be something that can be fixed without doing anything quite so drastic.

And if that doesn't work, ditch the b----.

Show her the front end of Fiero at 100mph . This time you'll push her away.

If your partner is threatening to leave over a car, by all means, let her. Something that childish is not worth treasuring, unlike like the gorgeous Fiero.

What you all seem to be forgetting is that a Fiero is, after all, just car. I'd give it all away for the perfect girl. Then again, I wear my heart on my sleeve. Also, the "utopian" perfect girl does not exist, for me anyway, though I have gotten close. I pushed that one away...horrifically dumb move on my part.

I guess what I'm saying is; if she's really that important to you, find out why she's pulling this nonsense. If it really is the car, then you need to evaulate your priorities. As much as I'd say the Fiero comes first, it doesn't, and never will. Make her understand that you need something to make you happy, other than her. If she's really the "one," she'll understand. Inasmuch as your Fiero means that much to you, I'm sure she has a similar affliction, other than you. Relate to her with that.

[This message has been edited by 1986 Fiero GT (edited 07-22-2010).]

Thanks Guys, im feeling better now. We talked for a while. She is not threatening anything like that I think she knows she wouldn't like the answer... but it just goes through my head when things are tough.

Its just hard to be thinking about the future and stuff and she can be very supportive and yes she does look very good washing my baby! But things can get tense and yes the car is the scapegoat. I do not want to head down any slippery slopes but at the same time I do not want to miss out on a very amazing and beautiful girl over a car. It really is not about the car though and I think things will be ok.

The real problem is she has no real hobbies or passions so mine take over. She's a straight A student and thats what she does. There is no school so my hobbies invade with her looking for a place to fit in. I can never understand her drive for A's but she cannot understand my love for cars either... I need to get her into a hobby to keep her distracted.

Anyway, Im rambling. Have a good night!

quote Originally posted by thedrue: Thanks Guys, im feeling better now. We talked for a while. She is not threatening anything like that I think she knows she wouldn't like the answer... but it just goes through my head when things are tough. Its just hard to be thinking about the future and stuff and she can be very supportive and yes she does look very good washing my baby! But things can get tense and yes the car is the scapegoat. I do not want to head down any slippery slopes but at the same time I do not want to miss out on a very amazing and beautiful girl over a car. It really is not about the car though and I think things will be ok. The real problem is she has no real hobbies or passions so mine take over. She's a straight A student and thats what she does. There is no school so my hobbies invade with her looking for a place to fit in. I can never understand her drive for A's but she cannot understand my love for cars either... I need to get her into a hobby to keep her distracted. Anyway, Im rambling. Have a good night!

It's important to keep a level head with all of this, and you seem to be doing a fine job of that. As I said in the post above, I had an eerily similar experience with my last girlfriend (the "perfect" one), and I regret not doing anything in my power to keep her around. From the getgo, I knew her complaint wasn't really about the car, it almost never is. I had a difficult time relating to my -ex, as she had ZERO hobbies, and I have enough for 15 people. If her schooling is so important to her, treat that as her hobby as it seems to be. Doing well in school is a lot tougher for some people than building a turbo 3.4L Fiero (like yours, if I remember correctly). Make sure she knows that you appreciate the sacrifices, if any, she makes for you and vice versa. The worst thing you can do is get pissed off. Keep your emotions in check and talk it out. Generally works pretty well, unless the issue is far more deep-seeded.

quote Originally posted by thedrue: Thanks Guys, im feeling better now. We talked for a while. She is not threatening anything like that I think she knows she wouldn't like the answer... but it just goes through my head when things are tough. Its just hard to be thinking about the future and stuff and she can be very supportive and yes she does look very good washing my baby! But things can get tense and yes the car is the scapegoat. I do not want to head down any slippery slopes but at the same time I do not want to miss out on a very amazing and beautiful girl over a car. It really is not about the car though and I think things will be ok. The real problem is she has no real hobbies or passions so mine take over. She's a straight A student and thats what she does. There is no school so my hobbies invade with her looking for a place to fit in. I can never understand her drive for A's but she cannot understand my love for cars either... I need to get her into a hobby to keep her distracted. Anyway, Im rambling. Have a good night!

Tell her she has to fail her classes, or else your walking! Ha, it's good to hear everything worked out.

I told my girlfriend before we became more serious that my Fiero if very important to me and she will need to understand that sometimes I need to spend some time on it and not her.

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Turbo 3800 E85 5spd spec5
11.53@126.7

i think a woman should support the man with his hobbie. and same with the man support the woman with hers.
if she isnt willing to support you in the things you like. then there is a problem. that may or may not be able to be fixed.

im assuming the car is apart of your life. you enjoy it greatly. the woman should respect that and accept it.
if she isnt then. she isnt really the right girl for you. there will be a girl who will love you for who you are and the things you like to do.
and will also really like your car.

just need to figure out whats more important to you. your fiero. or your girlfriend,
how would you feel if you sold your fiero and could never own one again?


didnt know you worked things out *edited*

[This message has been edited by joshh44 (edited 07-22-2010).]

Tell you to go make you a sammich.
That never works for me

Along the same lines as the people above, I told my wife before we got married that if she ever gave me the ultimatum of Car or Her. She would lose, and it wouldn't be because I love the car More than her, becuase in all honestly I love her much more than the car, but any woman that would force me to give up something I love, must really not understand me and is probably not the woman for me.

Skip ahead 10 years, we are now married have an 8 month old baby and 5 Fiero's. She has a SBC V8 5spd and a V6 Auto Show Fiero, and she gave me the go ahead to build my 4.9 5spd 857GT Fiero, plus encouraged me to buy my Yellow 88GT and won't let me sell it as it is the car we took out honeymoon road trip in, plus I just bought an 88 Coupe 4cyl 5spd. Oh and we bought a 96 Blazer when the 3 of us need to go someplace.

Things work out, if she can't accept you and your Fiero, then she really doesn't understand you. If you can get her to understand WHY you love your Fiero, you just might get her into one as a fun commuter car. Once she is addicted it gets much easier to bring home stray Fiero's too. Then dedicate a garage or room in the House for Fiero parts, or rent a storage locker for all the big parts.

P.S. her forum name is FieroChick

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85GT Soon to be 87GT,93 Eldorado 4.9, 5spd Dual O2 Custom Chip, Custom Exhaust. MSD Everything Capt Fiero --- My Over View Cadero Pics Yellow 88GT 5spd Full Poly Suspension, Lowered 1/2" in front, Corner Carver.

Amy knows, it's the Fiero in the garage time, or I sit at the end of a long bar drowning my sorrows in cheap beer. (Don't tell her that I don't drink. )

Oh girl friend you say well it is not the wife so show her the curb. Want a life of misery them marry this girl and buy a Toyota Tarago and start making babies she will be as happy as a guy in a fiero.

quote Originally posted by joshh44: i think a woman should support the man with his hobbie. and same with the man support the woman with hers.

Women don't have hobbies, unless you count "changing and improving their man" as a hobby.

quote Originally posted by css9450: Women don't have hobbies, unless you count "changing and improving their man" as a hobby.

hahhaa i laughed so hard it is soooooooo true.

Also remember there are no perfect women just one you don't want to slap in the morning. If she is having trouble with the fiero equate the car to her drive for straight A's its an accomplishment not a requirement.

quote Originally posted by thedrue: ....The real problem is she has no real hobbies or passions so mine take over.... I need to get her into a hobby to keep her distracted. Anyway, Im rambling. Have a good night!

Buy her a Fiero that she can love !!!

Lose the girl. Guys can be very controlling to women, see it all the time. I also see lots of controlling girls (then your called puzzy whipped). Married, you both have say in anything...dating, you dont. I love the guys who hit on every short skirted tease they see, but when they start dating them, they want to call them sluts/tramps for the way they dress.

quote Originally posted by thedrue: Is it bad that if my girlfriend told me to sell my Fiero or she was leaving I would keep the Fiero? I love Katey but she does a much better job of pushing me away than my Fiero ever has, and believe me when I say it has tried. Incidently the reason she hates my car so much is cause it is where I go to feel safe and comfy after she finds something else wrong with me. Women.

As a Girl, I have to say... Ditch her!
The girl should like you for you and your choices. We may not always agree with all the decisions you make, but we put up with them because well we started seeing you for the way you were in the first place! I get so tired of girls thinking they can or trying to change the guy that they are with. If he wasnt what you wanted to begin with then why were you with him?
Never ever ever try to get anyone to give something up that they care about!
I dont agree with drugs or drinking yourself into intoxication, but a car? Really?!
I love my fiero and if my guy tried to get me to choose between him and the car, he wouldnt like my answer. Never try to get your significant other to change. Its not fair and its not right. I wouldnt like it if my BF tried to change me in any way, so I refuse to try to get him to.

my two cents worth

That is a sign of selfishness on her behalf. If she is telling you what to do now, imagine when you marry her? The man is the head of the household and the woman is the complement. The woman has an important role in a family but she is not the one to make decisions, the man is. That doesn't mean that a woman doesn't have a voice in a family, before a man makes a decision he has to consult with his wife and vice versa. If you love this girl and want to marry her in the future, test her. Explain to her very kindly and understanding the reasons why you like this car and how much it means to you, if after that she insist in you getting rid of it then you'll know she wants to be the man of the house. In other words she wants to play a roll that belongs to you.
My wife hates my cars, but she understand how much they mean to me and for that I love her very much. I'm 40 years old and I've been married for 10 years.

Had I still been married, the X would have flipped out if I had wanted a Fiero. Her brother had a new 72 Camaro RS with a three speed Hurst shift on the floor (?). The car had a small block 302CI and ran like a scalded cat. She complained anytime she would ride in the car. How the car came with a 3 on the floor was a mystery to me, but that was the standard transmission according to her brother. He has wanted 3 on the tree as that what he learned to drive on years before.

The X's idea of a car was a Cadillac, which in the mid 70's was out of reach for us financially, but she never understood that concept.

So I have three Fieros and if one doesn't turn on, I can take another and the first one doesn't get jealouse. Try that concept with a womn.

So find a girl that has a fiero already!! lol... won't be any question of her or the fiero!!

Yes, they are out there... my daughter is one of them... and yes, she has plenty of hobbies besides the fiero, like anime, and manga, and blu-rays and dvds...and books!! She has amassed quite a collection!!

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What is the girl friend doing out of the kitchen...but on a serious note if she is pissed by a car...she'll be pissed by any car you love.

Hey I'll buy you a Fiero it she leaves you lol !!!

My wife has directly effected every car I have purchased in the last 10 years. The Fiero was her idea. When I wanted to install the V8 she said lets do it.
When I wanted a Vette she worked out the money and talked me into it when I found one I wanted. She even said she didn't have a problem with me getting another Fiero when I already had two running cars.

I cant relate.

Remove and replace, seriously - its something that you'd expect to hear on the playground when your 9.

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Is this where I insert something witty?

A good woman is worth more than diamonds and rubies,nothingin the world is better ,problem is very few of these women..Many,many ANGELS whose wings fall off before a year..and then start contention for leaker/witch of the year
..My girl friend left me because I missed Thanksgiving Dinner and when she called I told her I was working on the fiero,""she blew up"" since this woman was wealthy,,a great BUXOM beauty,smart ,funny,her relatives were funny as stand up comics,and she would dress to please me.she seldom beat me !!.I sorta screwed up,,PLUS she came back after being P.O ed that I was marrying another woman,,How ever she would NOT attend fiero club meetings and I had to go to Opera(after Opera she would make me beg for mercy) I am 68 years and can not replace her ..you are young and if all else fails,,Heavy drinking gives a man a purpose in life ,,Never take a lot of crap from a woman unless she is a nymphomaniac and does your buddies if you ask politely!!
HOW CAN YOU SPEAK OF LOVE IF YOU HAVE NO MONEY..Kieko Shinagawa 1964,okinawa

I have been with mine for 17 years now. She puts up with being dragged around the world and with me being dragged around the world alone. She puts up with 5 motorcycles and 4 Fieros plus a Jeep. She spends very little money on herself, in truth. I believe her to be one of the great ones. I remember dating a girl in college for a long period that gave me an ultimatum. Don't remember what it was but the important point is that she is a "former". Making decisions together is far different from being told what decision you will make.

The part is defective replace and return the core.

This reminds me of a time long ago. I told a girl her little spoiled rotten dog had to go or I was gone. She looked at me and said I had the dog before you so by. It was for the best. I saw her two years later. She went from size 1 jeans to wearing a tent.

the only way to see a womens point of view - go to the kitchen and look out of the window next to the sink

to the females on the forum - only joking.

jon

The key is that in your relationship you need to be strict. Once you let a woman assume control, you are done. IMO a good relationship is one where each partner is supportive of one another, their hobbies, interests likes and dislikes. You don't form a relationship to become a slave or subservient.
Within the context of what is legal, moral, ethical and responsible; I do what I want and I do as I please. Lay the law down now or be miserable for the rest of your life.

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" THE BLACK PARALYZER" -87GT 3800SC Series III engine, 3.4" Pulley, N* TB, LS1 MAF, Flotech Exhaust Autolite 104's Custom CAI 4T65eHD w. custom axles, HP Tuners VCM Suite.
"THE COLUSSUS"
87GT - ALL OUT 3.4L Turbocharged engine, Garrett Hybrid Turbo, MSD ign., modified TH125H
" ON THE LOOSE WITHOUT THE JUICE "

thanks for all the input! Im still trying to figure things out but I am not about to get into a situation I will regret. She is an amazing woman just does not think the same. And to be honest thats why I think we do so well together is were both very different and therefore can fill in each others gaps. Its just hard for her to see that sometimes and see how much I bring to the table.

How can I show her how much I have to offer? Shes very good in the house and responsible. I am a hard worker and can fix anything but have a harder time planning and keeping track of time. I figure we fit like a puzzle piece cause she keeps me focused and helps me plan and being a good cook is not bad either. But I keep life interesting provide a lot and she just does not realize how annoying it would be to have to rely on a shop or something to fix every little thing that I can keep on top of at home.

She is also in more of a rush for an engagement, I'm happy to take my time. But we have been dating for almost 3 years.

quote Originally posted by thedrue: She is also in more of a rush for an engagement, I'm happy to take my time. But we have been dating for almost 3 years.

That's scary... I'd be worried about her taking measures to try to trap you. Not all women are like that, but there are plenty that are. I'd be doubly worried if she's always talking about wanting kids...