I'm sure you have all noticed I haven't been very active on the forum the past few years. That doesn't mean I've forgotten about PFF. Behind the scenes I'm still working hard to keep the forum up and running as smoothly as it is. Uptime is still nearly 100%, the forum is still free of spammers and I still provide people with lost passwords, change thread titles for them, and answer Private Messages as fast as I can. In short, I haven't abandoned PFF at all as some of you have stated.
But, my life hasn't been exactly a smooth ride the past few years. The financial crisis from the past years has hit hard in Europe. And it has affected me too. In fact, in the past three years, all of my existing clients went bankrupt. Every single one of them. My income went from a comfortable one, to non-existing. I lived of my reserves but those quickly dried out. My wife (who has a hair salon) saw the same thing happen. She had to let go of all her employees, and she struggled keeping the salon alive. The past three years haven't been easy trying to make ends meet. Trying to support a family of four on a minimal income is incredibly difficult. It meant saving on everything we could.
On top of that, my health hasn't been all that great either. As some of you may know, I suffer from a disease that most of the time stays dormant. But when it hits, it hits hard. Potentially lethal. And it has hit me a few times these past years. I nearly died on two occasions. The odd thing is, that besides those flares, I feel great. I'm as fit as I can be. I run every day. I still play in a soccer team of 25 year olds and I can easily keep up with them. But like I said, when my disease strikes, it strikes hard. I'm just off the crutches since I had a huge hematoma in my leg. All in all, I've spent a lot of time in the hospital these few years.
All this has taken its toll on my marriage as well. In fact, My wife and I have divorced. We are still friends fortunately and we live only a few blocks away from each other. I will have to move soon however since I can no longer afford the apartment I live in. I hope I can find something nearby since I still want to see my kids every day.
So why am I telling you all this? Well, for starters, I occasionally come across the "Cliff no longer cares about PFF anymore since he's no longer around" posts. Or "you know the forum is in trouble when the moderator no longer gives a ****". I know. The usual suspects but I still think you have a right to know why it seems I'm not as active as I used to be. I'm still doing my best to keep PFF up and running with the limited resources I currently have.
And PFF is still "my baby". It still is very high on my priority list. It has been a 17-year long ride now. And if it is up to me, it will at least last another 17 years.
Wow. Lots going on. I'm sorry to hear about the downturn and all that has ensued. (Haven't heard much about the economics, on the news.) As I said in previous messages, take care of yourself. I wish you well.
[This message has been edited by Raydar (edited 02-12-2016).]
I was so happy to see a thread created by you, and wow, it was a "catchup" thread to boot! I am so sorry to hear how rough it has been for you and your family the past few years.
I have blabbed about some of the events that have transpired the last few years, but not all- there were some pretty awful things I have kept to myself... But this thread is about YOU- thank you for letting us know how you are doing,even though we don't interact with you that often, you ARE often in our thoughts. We appreciate you for all that you have done (and continue to do) here.
The world is a crazy place. Life is a struggle filled with awesome moments and terrible ones. I am very happy that I am able to find my way here and virtually wave at all of you. It helps to get through some of the "terrible ones"
Money woes and marriage woes (and health woes) are the worst because there are times there is nothing you can do about the problem. The money stuff is, as you have described, "larger than yourself.". Global economies and trends and financial crises... And the relationship troubles are perhaps the worst because not only are there moments when you realize the microcosm you have created is "toxic", but that your children are involved and combining the money trouble with the other stuff just becomes overwhelming.
It's around 6:30 am.I am on he train right now, heading into the city. It's cold, about 16 degrees. Hands are a little knumb. I am really deeply sorry to hear about the events of your life over the past few years, but am 'glad' that you are at the point where you can discuss it. I hope your kids are alright. I hope you as able to find some happiness with them. Divorce sucks, but it's become so common now.
It's difficult to sum up years of living in a few paragraphs of text. There are some nights where the mind could conjure up a library's worth of stories.
I hope you write some wonderful stories during the next few years, or at least one good autobiography... If you chart out your life, It sounds like you have survived the most recent dip in your lifecurve and have "leveled out". I hope you enter an upward curve the next few years.
Be well, Cliff.
-Rumor
[This message has been edited by TheDigitalAlchemist (edited 02-12-2016).]
I am sorry for your troubles, seems like the theme of the times. While I have done most of it to myself I also find myself in a similar situation. You never stop caring but its best to split then to try and stick it out till you hate each other.
I hate that money always seems to be what clobbers us, I think I would be just as happy working in a part time job if I could keep food on the table and still keep up with friends. I had hoped that I found a partner that believed the same way but its a challenge and you can not run someone elses life. They have to make that decision on their own.
It sucks about your disease, I also struggle with a hidden illness. Its something that hasn't had a lot of study so they don't really know what to expect. At times I believe they don't have a clue and then I start doubting. Then I am fine and life is what it is and you have to make the best of it. It hasn't tried to kill me so that's a plus, but the progression of treatment isnt acceptable, I would rather deal with the disease then the after effects of treatment. At least now I understand why I am the way I am and can accept that.
Life changes will probably force me to sell my last Fiero, but I wont stop coming here. PFF has been a place that I can talk to friends and get advice for years. They dont mind my venting (most of the time) and I feel like its family. Really helped getting past some rough times in my life having a place to talk.
Still remember you from years ago when you visited here.
Yeah, I hear you and those troubles seem to be universal, and I am not minimizing what you are going through. I almost sold the Fiero! As it seems to symbolize my early years, I had the Fiero since my twenties & early teens, I could not sacrifice all those years, but as we age relationships, jobs, and health all seem to faulter. Is there no cure? That is why I guess I keep the Fiero. On the right roads in the Fiero all those troubles seem to drift away momentarily.
Thank you, Cliff, for thinking of us during all of your hardship, and the work you do to keep this place going. I'm not a regular poster, but I lurk every day, and I get lots of enjoyment from this little dysfunctional family.
I really hope things start looking better for you.
Sorry to hear that Cliff I remember you always being here and especially when anyone had a surgery you would post. as we get older things we did as kids and teens and young adults sometimes catch up with us all. Then we have the medical problems we just inherit from our parents. Getting up there in age also eventually catches up with all of us, accidents and more can cause so many problems for many of us. I am sure we will all be here for you just like you have been for so many of us when we needed a lift or support in our time of needing help.
But money is the route of all evil and we all need routes, sometimes we need others to listen to us when things go wrong with our lives, look at how many times we have all helped others on here and never expected anything in return, just because we all are, for the most part good people who care about the others here. Like I have always said we have got to be the most dysfunctional family I have ever met, short of my own. But we are all family to each other, sure we argue, what family's don't? but for the most part it is about stupid crap and when we really need each other.
I know all about money problems causing family problems, many of us here do and it sucks, really sucks especially when it is not our own fault like medical problems. We are all here for you, just like you have been here all these years for us, I don't know what I would have done if after my stroke I didn't have this place to give everyone crap and a place to ***** about my problems,
Let us be there for you, like you have been for us, you need to talk, piss, moan and ***** , or just need someone to listen to what's happening in your life. As far as the money goes I think we can help somewhat with that at least for helping you with keeping this place open for the those of us who need to vent, learn about these cars that to many of those here almost consume their lives.
We all have times when we need help, I have gotten it myself here when I went in for my bypass, when my computer crashed and we were living off what little was left of my IRA, people here helped me and I would like to and try to be there for most anyone here who need help because of the others here who have helped me and not just Fiero related.
Maybe we should send you a beer, I know you don't drink but hey, you are family to me anyway. Take care of yourself and your family and we will always be here for you.
Good luck and good vibes things get better for you soon.
Thanks cliff for everything you do! Prayers for your life situation. Dont mind the uninformed who may complain. Hey, maybe there is someone who could help you out with the routine moderator duties? Also, we can still dontate to the cause correct?
Very sorry to hear what you have been going through. For what it's worth, many people here do realize that a forum such as this does not run itself. The fact that the technical side of the forum still runs along so beautifully is a testament to the work you have, and continue, to put into it!
You will be in my family's prayers, and I sincerely hope your situation improves very soon.
Sorry to hear about the the difficulties in your life and health issues. I wish the best for you and your family. Thanks for the fifteen years I've spent in this forum.
And PFF is still "my baby". It still is very high on my priority list. It has been a 17-year long ride now. And if it is up to me, it will at least last another 17 years.
May I ask, How/Where is the forum being hosted. Also, you mentioned having/had clients. what services outside of PFF are you providing.
It is a bit surprising to hear about your challenges since the forum functions almost flawlessly. I have enjoyed the forum's people and reliability, obviously the credit is yours. It is hard to imagine PFF no longer existing. But it's even worse to imagine all the information that has been archived as well. Without this community, there will be fewer Fieros on the road.
[This message has been edited by jmclemore (edited 02-12-2016).]
I am glad to read you have a positive attitude, that will go a long way as welll the support of your children! I am sorry to hear of your struggles. The one thing that comes through in your post is that you are goal oriented.
While I know that you aren't asking for assistance, you have developed this forum as a great networking tool, and you have never attempted to monetize it. With that being said maybe you could post the services/work that you do to see if there is any demand from the forum members or their networks to obtain work. IT is generally remote so nothing hurts to try.
I have been on the forum for most of the 17 years and have met you twice and will say that this forum has helped me greatly! Liek you and others I have kept a lot of my personal information close to the vest but this has always been a great outlet. I'll send some beer money since I haven't sent some in a while. Is there any other way that I, or the collective "we" as a forum can help?
Dude. You da man. No, really. Thank you for being so open about it. And from what little I know of you, I bet you didn't even tell everything that's happened. I hope I'm wrong, because that's enough. In the past, I didn't reply to bad news like this because I didn't know what to say. But after my own tragedy last year, I have learned that it's okay to say "I care" even if I don't really understand. So, hey... I care. Hang in there. And try to post more pics of your kids. We'd like to see 'em.
While I know that you aren't asking for assistance, you have developed this forum as a great networking tool, and you have never attempted to monetize it. With that being said maybe you could post the services/work that you do to see if there is any demand from the forum members or their networks to obtain work. IT is generally remote so nothing hurts to try.
Haven't been around that much, Cliff. Sorry to hear of your situation. At least it sounds like you and your wife still get along. Can't remember if you have children, if so, I don't have to tell you to continue to be in their lives as much as possible.
On another note.......if they're isn't any kids in your life you can always come here and deal with your "other children" that sometimes misbehave and need a good ol' talkin' to or maybe a spankin' here and there.
He liked Fieros, he got a Fiero and he created this site for peple all over the globe that like Fieros to share their excitement, experience, knowledge and general fondness of/for the Fiero. He didn't charge a fee to join. He never asked for a membership fee. He didn't plaster the board with advertisers, didn't ask anybody for help with it, did it all on his own.
I remember getting my first Fiero and looking around the "net" to see what was out there concerning them. Just happened onto this site.
I think at the time there were maybe 50 or so members. Great I thought, there ARE other guys out there that think this is a pretty sweet car with all kinds of potential for upgrades, there was no fee, so I signed up.
Cliff has created a place where allot of us come on a regular basis. We count on it being here, get upset if for any reason it's not, even if it's just for an hour or two because of a gliche somewhere. It has become part of our lives for some of us.
Many here have found new friends, made business deals, shared emotion, good times, bad times and mostly, our love for this "little plastic car", because this board exists.
As has been pointed out by others many times, we are the definition of a family, at least on one level. When family is in trouble, you help out if you can. In this case, most of us can help a little.
I can't think of any other source that provides on a regular basis, all the benefits and enjoyment for FREE that Ciff Pennock has provided here. Course, I don't get out much, but I think you get the gist of what I'm saying here. Are there other sites like this......yes and no. There are others that emulate it, but none ARE this one. It is special, it was one of the first, and IMHO, it's the best.....and still FREE.
Cliff's a real person, and did all this then invited anybody who wanted to join, to do so.....here we are. Now, he's having a rough time, to put it mildly.
Would we all survive if the forum went down......sure we would....would we miss it.....you bet. But he's not even threatening to shut it down despite all his problems, he just explained and shared a little bit what he's had to go through in his life recently.
My point? If we can help a little by maybe helping with the bills, even temporarily, why wouldn't we? I've kicked in, wish it could be more, but things haven't been exactly rosey for me either in recent years. But I feel we owe Cliff a huge debt of gratitude, and that we can at least anti-up a little to help.
The membership count shows we are over 20,000 members. If even 10% are active and only half of them kick in just $10.00, that'd be a sizeable contribution and I would think would ease the load, even if just a one time deal. Breathing space. Couldn't hurt.
Cliff's not asking, but I'm sure if we think about all that he's done, and all that he does, we can find a few bucks to send to Holland to help.
Others have volunteered already Cliff, but put me on the list of those willing to at least provide an ear should you ever need/want it.
Cmon' guys, we get decorations on holidays, presents at Christmas, even sparklers on the 4th, and Cliff doesn't even live here! Think of it as putting a few dollar bills in that Christmas elf's garter in December!
I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
Dang Cliff, that's harsh Hope things turn around for you. I remember when I was first looking to get into fieros, this place was the first google result. I actually skipped past it at first because I saw the .nl and figured it was a regional enthusiast site I'm glad I changed my mind and checked it out!
He liked Fieros, he got a Fiero and he created this site for peple all over the globe that like Fieros to share their excitement, experience, knowledge and general fondness of/for the Fiero. He didn't charge a fee to join. He never asked for a membership fee. He didn't plaster the board with advertisers, didn't ask anybody for help with it, did it all on his own.
I remember getting my first Fiero and looking around the "net" to see what was out there concerning them. Just happened onto this site.
I think at the time there were maybe 50 or so members. Great I thought, there ARE other guys out there that think this is a pretty sweet car with all kinds of potential for upgrades, there was no fee, so I signed up.
Cliff has created a place where allot of us come on a regular basis. We count on it being here, get upset if for any reason it's not, even if it's just for an hour or two because of a gliche somewhere. It has become part of our lives for some of us.
Many here have found new friends, made business deals, shared emotion, good times, bad times and mostly, our love for this "little plastic car", because this board exists.
As has been pointed out by others many times, we are the definition of a family, at least on one level. When family is in trouble, you help out if you can. In this case, most of us can help a little.
I can't think of any other source that provides on a regular basis, all the benefits and enjoyment for FREE that Ciff Pennock has provided here. Course, I don't get out much, but I think you get the gist of what I'm saying here. Are there other sites like this......yes and no. There are others that emulate it, but none ARE this one. It is special, it was one of the first, and IMHO, it's the best.....and still FREE.
Cliff's a real person, and did all this then invited anybody who wanted to join, to do so.....here we are. Now, he's having a rough time, to put it mildly.
Would we all survive if the forum went down......sure we would....would we miss it.....you bet. But he's not even threatening to shut it down despite all his problems, he just explained and shared a little bit what he's had to go through in his life recently.
My point? If we can help a little by maybe helping with the bills, even temporarily, why wouldn't we? I've kicked in, wish it could be more, but things haven't been exactly rosey for me either in recent years. But I feel we owe Cliff a huge debt of gratitude, and that we can at least anti-up a little to help.
The membership count shows we are over 20,000 members. If even 10% are active and only half of them kick in just $10.00, that'd be a sizeable contribution and I would think would ease the load, even if just a one time deal. Breathing space. Couldn't hurt.
Cliff's not asking, but I'm sure if we think about all that he's done, and all that he does, we can find a few bucks to send to Holland to help.
Others have volunteered already Cliff, but put me on the list of those willing to at least provide an ear should you ever need/want it.
Cmon' guys, we get decorations on holidays, presents at Christmas, even sparklers on the 4th, and Cliff doesn't even live here! Think of it as putting a few dollar bills in that Christmas elf's garter in December!
I could go on and on, but I think you get the idea.
The effects of the financial crises are still being felt in a lot of places in the US, too. Just because it isn't discussed in the media doesn't mean it isn't happening. Back home in Michigan is the best example.
The only reasons I was able to get a job a few years ago were luck and persistence, both of which worked. Hang in there!
With all of the trials and tribulations that have happened to you, you are still there for us...keeping this place going, and never once, until now, mentioning anything about what life was like for you. I can only imagine what things are like for you, Cliff. I have nothing to add that hasn't already been said by others in this thread. But I CAN say...thank you, for all you do for all of us, without asking for anything in return.
I have been feeling a little sorry for myself the past year, with some health issues I've had...but they pale in comparison to your troubles. I truly hope that your life finds a stable center, and soon, and that things start looking up for you.
Count me among the people that will be more than happy to "buy you a beer"....
The money and the business problems. Well...Welcome to America since 2007. That has been the story here for awhile but it coming around like it does in cycles I hope it does for you too.
Adding the health problem on top is truly adding insult to injury. I can relate 100% but we are proof that we can persevere!
The divorce though! Oh man. That is very upsetting! You have my deepest condolences. I can make more money and the doctors can fix me up best they can but a divorce is just devastating on a level I can not evenly relate with. It would end me. I am only here for my wife and family. It what the other stuff is all for.
Thanks everybody for your kind words. It means a lot to me.
Yes, I still have the Fiero. I simply can't part with it. It isn't in great shape but it isn't in bad shape either. Nothing that can't be fixed. I'm not allowed to drive it in the months december, january and february. That's some weird rule here in the Netherlands. The Fiero is now 30 years old and is considered an oldtimer. With oldtimers, you are offered a reduction in roadtaxes and a quite substantial at that. You only have to pay 25% of what it normally would be if and only if you don't drive it in earlier said months.
Wow. I just noticed the donations! Thank you all for your generosity! It really helps a lot! But I want you to know that was not the reason I posted my message. I just wanted you all to know that PFF has not been abandoned by me. In fact, I'm working on a completely new version of it. I have no idea when I will actually have the time to implement it, but I hope this year.
Again, thank you all for your kindness and generosity!
Not sure what I can add other than you are in my prayers, my friend. I remember talking to you on the phone once (years ago). Just as pleasant as you are on the forum. Other than tossing a few bucks in the pot, I don't know how I can help you but I wish I could.
Wow. I just noticed the donations! Thank you all for your generosity! It really helps a lot! But I want you to know that was not the reason I posted my message. I just wanted you all to know that PFF has not been abandoned by me. In fact, I'm working on a completely new version of it. I have no idea when I will actually have the time to implement it, but I hope this year.
Again, thank you all for your kindness and generosity!
Lots going on. I'm sorry to hear about the downturn and all that has ensued. (Haven't heard much about the economics, on the news.)
Take care of yourself and your family and we will always be here for you. 
