I have recently noticed that my chair has a very mild stench of sweaty, nasty butthole. It doesn't cover the room or anything, just the chair. BUT, if I sit down in jeans and sit for 30 minutes, my jeans smell the same way! Again, it's not a strong odor, but I have a very strong nose and HATE when I smell bad.
I can't figure out how to clean it! It's fabric! I've sprayed it with febreeze but that is a temporary fix. It's not like I can run it through a carwash or the washing machine, it's a chair!
So how do I fix this? Just don't sit in it for awhile? Smells are important to me, I always smell good or I won't go out. And this makes me smell bad.
I had a chair that a roommate borrowed for a semester and came back smelling of nasty BO. I stuck it out by the dumpster and found a better chair at the same dumpster. Problem solved!
"A pack of the jelly beans that make farts smell better will run you about $3.25. There are plans to release 35 different scents, but so far there is Sensation, Clara, and Calvin Klein. Ironic that they would choose to make jelly beans instead of any other type of candy"
"Next time you walk into a bar and the hottest chick rips one, she may be sending you a strong signal. A good signal. The stink of rotten eggs could be giving you a nice life indeed. Hydrogen sulphide (H2S) causes erections in rats, and studies are underway to determine if this will be an effective alternative to Viagra.
The penis is packed with spongy tissue that produces an erection when it fills with blood. Nitric oxide (NO) helps relax the walls of arteries that supply the penis, allowing extra blood to flow in. Viagra works by blocking an enzyme that destroys NO. H2S has recently been shown to relax the walls of major blood vessels too. Now Giuseppe Cirino at the University of Naples Federico II in Italy and his colleagues have found enzymes that produce H2S in human penile tissue. (newscientist)"
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01:33 AM
GT-X Member
Posts: 1507 From: Crestwood, KY Registered: Feb 2003
But honestly, I'm lazy. Just stick the poo-chair out by the curb and someone will pick it up within a couple hours. Then just troll Craigslist for a few minutes and I'm sure you'll find a nice leather office chair for fairly cheap that you can pick up. I LOOOOOOVE craigslist.
Smells in un-washable fabrics may take quite a while to air out and I don't think a leather/vinyl chair would absorb fart stinks like a fabric chair would.
But honestly, I'm lazy. Just stick the poo-chair out by the curb and someone will pick it up within a couple hours. Then just troll Craigslist for a few minutes and I'm sure you'll find a nice leather office chair for fairly cheap that you can pick up. I LOOOOOOVE craigslist.
Smells in un-washable fabrics may take quite a while to air out and I don't think a leather/vinyl chair would absorb fart stinks like a fabric chair would.
I don't have enough money to buy a new chair that won't give me back aches in my long sits of homework.
"A pack of the jelly beans that make farts smell better will run you about $3.25. There are plans to release 35 different scents, but so far there is Sensation, Clara, and Calvin Klein. Ironic that they would choose to make jelly beans instead of any other type of candy"
"Next time you walk into a bar and the hottest chick rips one, she may be sending you a strong signal. A good signal. The stink of rotten eggs could be giving you a nice life indeed. Hydrogen sulphide (H2S) causes erections in rats, and studies are underway to determine if this will be an effective alternative to Viagra.
The penis is packed with spongy tissue that produces an erection when it fills with blood. Nitric oxide (NO) helps relax the walls of arteries that supply the penis, allowing extra blood to flow in. Viagra works by blocking an enzyme that destroys NO. H2S has recently been shown to relax the walls of major blood vessels too. Now Giuseppe Cirino at the University of Naples Federico II in Italy and his colleagues have found enzymes that produce H2S in human penile tissue. (newscientist)"
Hahahahahaha.
Hahahahaha
Haha
Well, the fart flirts were hilarious. Thank you for that. But I don't think the jelly beans would work. Sounds like a scam to me, and I don't like scams
quote
Originally posted by GT-X:
Occasional light dustings of baking soda should absorb and neutralize the odor. Just don't use enough to rub off on you.
~Tyler
Thanks, I'll try that tomorrow.
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01:42 AM
Australian Member
Posts: 4701 From: Sydney Australia Registered: Sep 2004
I have recently noticed that my chair has a very mild stench of sweaty, nasty butthole. It doesn't cover the room or anything, just the chair. BUT, if I sit down in jeans and sit for 30 minutes, my jeans smell the same way! Again, it's not a strong odor, but I have a very strong nose and HATE when I smell bad.
I can't figure out how to clean it! It's fabric! I've sprayed it with febreeze but that is a temporary fix. It's not like I can run it through a carwash or the washing machine, it's a chair!
So how do I fix this? Just don't sit in it for awhile? Smells are important to me, I always smell good or I won't go out. And this makes me smell bad.
Any advice?
Always take Bean-o before a meal
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08:05 AM
Pyrthian Member
Posts: 29569 From: Detroit, MI Registered: Jul 2002
Use fresh coffee grinds on your seat and leave it uncovered when not in use.When you are sitting in it,put a couple heavy towels on it to absorb the stench.Change towels and coffee grinds often ! Have you noticed how other peoples farts always are repulsive to you,but yours aren't,no matter how bad they are? GOOD LUCK !
[This message has been edited by hugh (edited 11-03-2010).]
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08:26 AM
82-T/A [At Work] Member
Posts: 25553 From: Florida USA Registered: Aug 2002
I have recently noticed that my chair has a very mild stench of sweaty, nasty butthole. It doesn't cover the room or anything, just the chair. BUT, if I sit down in jeans and sit for 30 minutes, my jeans smell the same way! Again, it's not a strong odor, but I have a very strong nose and HATE when I smell bad.
I can't figure out how to clean it! It's fabric! I've sprayed it with febreeze but that is a temporary fix. It's not like I can run it through a carwash or the washing machine, it's a chair!
So how do I fix this? Just don't sit in it for awhile? Smells are important to me, I always smell good or I won't go out. And this makes me smell bad.
Any advice?
Damn... that's nasty.
Well, do you have a pressure washer? I'd have at it with the pressure washer, and then put some detergent in there... then leave it out in the sun for it to dry out.
Instead of farting directly on the chair, just stand up when you fart and have a fan blowing the toxic gas elsewhere. There, problem solved.
There ya go.
Perhaps bathe a bit more frequently, and change your underwear daily.
Maybe eat some bean-o before each meal. pop a few activated charcoal tablets.
Or stop sticking it in the wrong hole, then immediatly after you're done,scamper in and Tweet about it (sans clothing) (I suspect this is the true source of your odor).
Have you noticed how other peoples farts always are repulsive to you,but yours aren't,no matter how bad they are?
oh HEEEEEELLLL no! I have to call on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
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09:03 AM
hugh Member
Posts: 5563 From: Clementon,NJ,USA Registered: Jun 2000
oh HEEEEEELLLL no! I have to call on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
You're not being honest with yourself,are you a secret sniffer?We're all your friends here,so confess and you will be free to sniff forevermore unfetered by society standards.
oh HEEEEEELLLL no! I have to call on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
Been there done that..... Dont get me wrong my dog has cleard out a room to.
oh HEEEEEELLLL no! I have to call on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
Everyone likes the smell of their own brand!
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12:35 PM
2.5 Member
Posts: 43235 From: Southern MN Registered: May 2007
"A company called The Pond Inc. is now selling a product called "Subtle Butt", billed as a fart neutralizer, to eliminate smelly flatulence.
It's an activated carbon fabric pad, measuring 3.25" x 3.25" square, and adheres to the inside of your underwear with two self-adhesive strips.
As the wind breaks, Subtle Butt filters the flatulence, absorbing and neutralizing its odor. Now you can eat as many burritos you want and still have a social life.
Febreeze only masks odor, it does not kill the bacteria that causes it. You need a disinfectant with an enzyme that eats bacteria. I use Cavicide on everything. It kills athletes foot in a week, too.
Febreeze only masks odor, it does not kill the bacteria that causes it. You need a disinfectant with an enzyme that eats bacteria. I use Cavicide on everything. It kills athletes foot in a week, too.
Yes, safe for fabrics but it is usually for hard surfaces (Its a tattoo shop and hospital disinfectant) .. but believe me, it will get the smell out of your fabric. I have "swamp foot" three times a year.. no need to throw the shoes out, just spray them with cavacide and the "foot-y"smell.. its gone, and stays gone for a while. Good luck, dub!
oh HEEEEEELLLL no! I have to call on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
I made our cat retarded, does that count? And I have ran myself out of the room.
Brad
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02:42 PM
84fiero123 Member
Posts: 29950 From: farmington, maine usa Registered: Oct 2004
The GasBGon® flatulence odor control seat cushion is a high performance air filter designed to look and feel like a conventional seat cushion incorporating a sound dampening filter and a proprietary activated carbon odor filter. The seat cushion functions as a powerful passive control device to effectively muffle the sound and adsorb the odor associated with flatulence. Each cushion is complete with a washable zippered cover for filter insertion/replacement, they are lightweight (less than 1 lb) and are nominally 15 inches square and 1 inch thick. Each cushion comes complete with a sound and odor filter. While the GasBGon seat cushion does not reduce the number of flatulence outbursts its user produces; it does insert several degrees of separation between the person committing the act and the people within his or her immediate vicinity. The degree of separation it creates is sufficient to render each flatulence outburst environmentally and socially acceptable for most end-users. Where to use; at home watching TV, office settings, family car trips, planes and at tailgating parties, where GasBGon helps level the playing field between partygoers and party-poopers. Applications are truly dependent on one's imagination and that special knowledge of your loved on. Instructions: Remove product from plastic bag, place tush on side opposite zipper, sit and rip!
I am afraid to think what the interior of your Fiero must smell like.
[This message has been edited by Formula88 (edited 11-03-2010).]
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02:59 PM
hugh Member
Posts: 5563 From: Clementon,NJ,USA Registered: Jun 2000
------------------ Two yeast spent their entire life "about 2 days" discussing what the purpose of life could be and not once did they even come close to the fact that they were making champagne. Quoted by: Unknown
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08:21 PM
jimbolaya Member
Posts: 10652 From: Virginia Beach, Virginia Registered: Feb 2007
What ya needs is a distraction. Put a dead mouse under something on the other side of the office (or house). People will concentrate on that instead of on your stinkage.
Edit: then you can find it and be the hero, and say "See? I told you it wasn't me!"
[This message has been edited by Cheever3000 (edited 11-04-2010).]
What ya needs is a distraction. Put a dead mouse under something on the other side of the office (or house). People will concentrate on that instead of on your stinkage.
Edit: then you can find it and be the hero, and say "See? I told you it wasn't me!"
Shhh! Nobody suspects a thing yet!
Actually, the stench is gone. I figured out what it was when I came home from my football game yesterday.... and the first thing I did was plop in my chair.
I remembered one game where I came home and sat down while my friends all came in my room and visited for about an hour... then I forgot to shower.
Yup... butt sweat just going unwashed after a football game.
It's mostly gone, I am just waiting on that disinfectant to come in so I can spray it on my roommate's sheets when he goes to class. He REALLY stinks.
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08:51 PM
partfiero Member
Posts: 6923 From: Tucson, Arizona Registered: Jan 2002
it is more likely a mold.
on this one! You're not a real man until you've not only gagged yourself from your fermented flatulence.. but knocked the dog out of the room too.
