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HowTo: Sending me nasty emails. by Cliff Pennock
Started on: 12-21-2010 09:36 PM
Replies: 45 (885 views)
Last post by: 82-T/A [At Work] on 04-17-2017 08:52 PM
Cliff Pennock
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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:36 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Cliff PennockClick Here to visit Cliff Pennock's HomePageClick Here to Email Cliff PennockSend a Private Message to Cliff PennockEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Lately, it seems that sending me nasty emails has become the favorite pastime of a lot of people. I suspect these people are members of this forum - perhaps even banned members. But usually these emails are so incoherent that I can't be certain. That's why I feel it's necessary to write this HowTo.

HowTo: Sending me nasty emails

  1. Identify yourself
    I understand you wish to remain anonymous so I'm not asking you to identify yourself with your real name. Chances are that if you give me your real name, I still have no idea who you are. But leaving out any indication of what/who/where you are makes your entire rant, well, pointless. How am I supposed to feel bad about something if you keep me guessing what your email is pertaining to? So if you are a member on this forum, please include your user name. So I at least can look it up and see why you are throwing a fit. Otherwise, you are simply leaving me in the dark. For instance, some time ago, I got this through mail. It made no sense to me at all. Still doesn't.

     
    quote
    you stupid **** you are no better then the rest if you allow such things why me and not the others i could come back but whatsthe point

    Which brings me to my second point:

  2. Use proper punctuation
    Seriously, I truly understand you must be mad about something or you wouldn't go through the trouble of sending me an email. I mean, it means you have to spend extra time behind your computer while you could be out with your friends drinking a beer instead, or find out why your wife/girlfriend has been wearing sexy lingerie all evening and why she's calling you from the bedroom because she needs "something fixed". Heck, it's not like you want to spend your waking hours behind a keyboard... But even so, please take a bit more time making your email more readable next time. If you want me to take you seriously, at least try to make it look a bit less like it was written by an incoherent raving idiot. You is an intelligent person! Yes you is! So show it by using a full stop every now and then. Perhaps even use capitals at the beginning of a sentence. Oh, and perhaps do a refresh course English. I'm Dutch but my English is quite a bit better than yours. That must be embarrassing.

  3. Don't pretend to be somebody you are not
    And with that I don't mean false names or stuff like that, but for instance don't pretend to be some l33t hacker when you are not. I have worked in Information Technology for over 30 years now so I kinda know what is real and what's just "IT bluff". For instance, I got this through email today:

     
    quote
    you cant stop me from joining. i can create severl ip addresses so if i want i could mess up your forum

    First of all, kudos for using a full stop in that sentence and for mentioning the forum so I can at least presume you must be a banned member (just keep working on those capital letters 'mkay?). Second, you know you could make a killing creating IP addresses? There's a tremendous shortage so if you are able to create them, you could make a fortune! Seriously, all kidding aside, next time don't try to explain how you are going to mess up my forum. Something like this is much more effective:

     
    quote
    You can't stop me from joining. I can seriously mess up your forum if I truly wanted to.

    Now that was frightening. Although the "if I truly wanted to" usually translates to "if I knew how" in my mind - so best to leave that out.

  4. Turn of your automatic signature
    If you are going to threaten me, make sure you have your automatic signature turned off. You have any idea how stupid you look when I receive something like this:

     
    quote
    you are a ******* ******* and if i see you im going to kick your face in

    --
    Kind regards,

    Johnatan Doe
    123 Westminster Street
    Somecity ST 12345

    Again, if you want me to take you seriously, at least show some sign of intelligence.

  5. Say to yourself: what would a 12-year old do?
    And then do the exact opposite. Really, PhotoShopping a picture of me you found on the internet isn't going to make me pee my pants. What are you expecting? That I think "Oh noes, this guy has mad PhotoShop skillz - better watch out for him!"? Focus! You are trying to insult me! Not trying to get a job at my company as a graphics designer! Also, calling me "gay", "douchebag", "dickhead" or anything else you can come up with doesn't really entices me thinking I'm dealing with an adult here.


    HowTo: Sending me nasty emails Part II

    First of all, If you are wondering what happened to part 2-10, then yeah, you are probably one of the people I wrote this HowTo for...

  6. Use a map
    Ok, I might be confusing you here. Why would you need a map to send me a nasty email? I'll tell you why. Look up where you live. Then look up where I live. See how far we are apart? Perhaps you remember from your high school days that we in Europe live in a different timezone than you do. And perhaps you even remember what that means. Let me refresh your memory. It means that there's at least a 6 hour time difference between you and me. Meaning, if you live on the east coast and send me a nasty email at 10PM, I receive it at 4AM. No, not because it took 6 hours for the email to arrive. Sheesh, haven't you been paying attention? It's because when it's 10PM where you live, it's 4AM where I live. So when you send me another nasty email at 10:05PM wondering why I haven't answered you yet, it's not because:

     
    quote
    No balls to respond with an intelligent answer ? Or just no intelligent answer to respond with ?

    No, it's because I'm asleep you moron!

  7. Be more specific
    Trying to impress me with vague statements, well, isn't going to. For instance, a few days ago I got this through email.

     
    quote
    I don't need you. My local Fiero club is enough. And only 1 of them is a member of your forum.

    So this is going to impress me, how? Be more specific! Say something like "My local Fiero club with a thousand members is all I need. And only one person thinks it's of any use being a member of your forum". Now that would impress me. The way you formulated it though, an image forms in my head where I see you and your G.I. Joe action figures sitting around a small table drinking tea pretending to be "the local Fiero club".


This concludes part 2 of my HowTo. Who knows, maybe I'll post a part 3!!!

[Edited by Cliff Pennock: Added part 2]

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$Rich$
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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:38 PM Click Here to See the Profile for $Rich$Click Here to Email $Rich$Send a Private Message to $Rich$Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

ill take the blame, i did it, ban me

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Zeb
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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:41 PM Click Here to See the Profile for ZebSend a Private Message to ZebEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

I'm waiting with baited breath! Thanks, I wasn't really sure how to be a complete idiot. Despite having grown up in New Jersey.

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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:47 PM Click Here to See the Profile for InTheLeadSend a Private Message to InTheLeadEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Don't make me telnet to your wingate and root your box

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MidEngineManiac
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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:47 PM Click Here to See the Profile for MidEngineManiacSend a Private Message to MidEngineManiacEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

I'm not real worried about it...........

Cliff has 20,000 guys to step up for him.......

a couple shouldnt be that much of a problem.

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newf
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Report this Post12-21-2010 09:48 PM Click Here to See the Profile for newfSend a Private Message to newfEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Got to say, this is one of, if not the best run site I have ever been on. You have been nothing if not fair to anyone I have seen have issues on here.

Whoever these people are that are sending you this stuff, they really need to get a life.

Thank you for the site and keep up the great work Cliff.

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Report this Post12-21-2010 10:02 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Formula88Send a Private Message to Formula88Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Outstanding, Cliff!

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Shananigans
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Report this Post12-21-2010 10:15 PM Click Here to See the Profile for ShananigansSend a Private Message to ShananigansEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

What a completely ignorant fool and a pathetic coward, hiding not so anonymously behind a keyboard. Maybe I should be worried now,I live in the states, he could come kick my face in, I'm scared. NOT

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Patrick's Dad
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Report this Post12-21-2010 11:09 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Patrick's DadClick Here to visit Patrick's Dad's HomePageClick Here to Email Patrick's DadSend a Private Message to Patrick's DadEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

This is classic. Especially:

 
quote
Originally posted by Cliff:

I'm Dutch but my English is quite a bit better than yours. That must be embarrassing.


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Report this Post12-21-2010 11:22 PM Click Here to See the Profile for JefrysukoSend a Private Message to JefrysukoEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by Cliff Pennock:

You is an intelligent person! Yes you is!



Good Golley, your right. I is smart. Just like my Mama told me!

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kwagner
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Report this Post12-21-2010 11:25 PM Click Here to See the Profile for kwagnerClick Here to visit kwagner's HomePageSend a Private Message to kwagnerEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Nice

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Report this Post12-22-2010 12:09 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fieroguy123Click Here to Email fieroguy123Send a Private Message to fieroguy123Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

OMG I'm dying sitting here waiting on part 2!

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Report this Post12-22-2010 12:25 AM Click Here to See the Profile for Marvin McInnisClick Here to visit Marvin McInnis's HomePageSend a Private Message to Marvin McInnisEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by Cliff Pennock:

I'm Dutch but my English is quite a bit better than yours. That must be embarrassing.



One would think so, but some people seem defiantly proud of their marginal literacy. Silly guy ... it's your responsibility to accept their laziness and your responsibility to understand what they're trying to say!

Oh ... and if I ever send you a nastygram, I assure you that it will be signed with my real name, on purpose.

[This message has been edited by Marvin McInnis (edited 12-22-2010).]

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Report this Post12-22-2010 01:28 AM Click Here to See the Profile for spark1Send a Private Message to spark1Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

I’m cutting words out of magazines, pasting them on paper and mailing them to Cliff.

Hope he doesn’t notice my return address label.

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Report this Post12-22-2010 03:53 AM Click Here to See the Profile for billpappsSend a Private Message to billpappsEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by spark1:

I’m cutting words out of magazines, pasting them on paper and mailing them to Cliff.

Hope he doesn’t notice my return address label.


Now thats funny... HEH

I read most my mail with fort agent. Its pretty hard to spoof where it came from with out a lot of trouble. If he is
able to spoof it.. I would think he been doing illegal activate anyways..

I ran gaming severs for a long time.. I am sure that this forum gets hit just like my severs did.
It always seemed to me that Cliff had this will under control..

Empty worthless threats would piss me off faster then real ones.

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Report this Post12-22-2010 04:29 AM Click Here to See the Profile for FriendGregoryClick Here to Email FriendGregorySend a Private Message to FriendGregoryEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Thanks, now that I have the correct format, it is time for me to start sending....not!

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Jim

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FieroRumor
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Report this Post12-22-2010 09:37 AM Click Here to See the Profile for FieroRumorClick Here to visit FieroRumor's HomePageClick Here to Email FieroRumorSend a Private Message to FieroRumorEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Lol @ # 4

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Report this Post12-22-2010 10:04 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fastblackSend a Private Message to fastblackEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by FieroRumor:

Lol @ # 4


Lol, it's like prank calling and not using *67...not that I know the proper protocol for prank calling or anything, er.....

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Report this Post12-22-2010 10:22 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fierobearClick Here to Email fierobearSend a Private Message to fierobearEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by Zeb:

I'm waiting with baited breath! Thanks, I wasn't really sure how to be a complete idiot. Despite having grown up in New Jersey.


You can't be a *complete* idiot until you've grown up in Jersey AND moved to New York. You earn intelligence points back for getting disgusted and moving to Pennsylvania.

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Report this Post12-22-2010 01:32 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Doni HaganSend a Private Message to Doni HaganEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

"123 Westminster Street
Somecity ST 12345"

Ooops....did I REALLY leave my home address on there??

BTW, Cliff....please have a safe and happy holiday!

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Report this Post12-22-2010 01:37 PM Click Here to See the Profile for avengador1Click Here to Email avengador1Send a Private Message to avengador1Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

This just shows how some people have no class and can't get over being banned for being jerks.

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Larryh86GT
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Report this Post12-22-2010 01:48 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Larryh86GTSend a Private Message to Larryh86GTEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Use proper punctuation
This is going to stop a lot of folks from sending you emails Cliff.

Larry

------------------

"Life is short.
Drink the good wine first"

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nellieship
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Absolutely loved this post! Made me laugh out loud Cliff!

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Report this Post12-22-2010 04:17 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Nurb432Send a Private Message to Nurb432Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by Larryh86GT:

Use proper punctuation
This is going to stop a lot of folks from sending you emails Cliff.

Larry


Just as long as its not a new rule to be able to post. If so, i'm screwed.

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Report this Post12-22-2010 04:57 PM Click Here to See the Profile for starlightcoupeSend a Private Message to starlightcoupeEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Now that I know how to send you a nasty email, are there any rules for nice emails?

Your English is impeccable while my German seems to have a Dutch accent. I was asked several times, "Sind sie Hollander?"

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pontiackid86
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Report this Post12-22-2010 05:00 PM Click Here to See the Profile for pontiackid86Click Here to Email pontiackid86Send a Private Message to pontiackid86Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Geese cliff.. lot of haters out there..... None of this compares to redfieroman aka fierofury33 though.
 
quote
Ima punch you in the face old man


priceless.

[This message has been edited by pontiackid86 (edited 12-22-2010).]

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Cliff Pennock
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Report this Post12-22-2010 06:28 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Cliff PennockClick Here to visit Cliff Pennock's HomePageClick Here to Email Cliff PennockSend a Private Message to Cliff PennockEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Added point 6 and 7 (part 2).

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tonycampbell86gt
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Report this Post12-22-2010 08:07 PM Click Here to See the Profile for tonycampbell86gtClick Here to visit tonycampbell86gt's HomePageClick Here to Email tonycampbell86gtSend a Private Message to tonycampbell86gtEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Well said, Cliff!



Tony

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Report this Post12-22-2010 09:32 PM Click Here to See the Profile for BlacktreeClick Here to visit Blacktree's HomePageClick Here to Email BlacktreeSend a Private Message to BlacktreeEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Funny stuff! LOL

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Report this Post12-22-2010 09:35 PM Click Here to See the Profile for heybjornClick Here to Email heybjornSend a Private Message to heybjornEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Trying to impress me with vague statements,


Well, some of us aren't Dutch so this is the best we can do. Even with help from fierofetish about Europe.

( That Dutch place is in Europe, isn't it? )

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Back On Holiday
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Report this Post12-22-2010 09:53 PM Click Here to See the Profile for Back On HolidayClick Here to Email Back On HolidaySend a Private Message to Back On HolidayEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

ROFLMAO

The one sentence you posted reminded me of lowlux

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86FieroSEv6
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Report this Post12-22-2010 10:28 PM Click Here to See the Profile for 86FieroSEv6Click Here to Email 86FieroSEv6Send a Private Message to 86FieroSEv6Edit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

The fact that there could be material out there for a part III has me a teensy bit worried about the future of the human race. Cliff . . . . you da man, fo sho!

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Report this Post12-22-2010 10:37 PM Click Here to See the Profile for FlambergeSend a Private Message to FlambergeEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

HAHAHAHA!!!! This is great stuff!

The best is accidentally leaving the signature on the email. BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

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maryjane
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Report this Post12-23-2010 03:02 AM Click Here to See the Profile for maryjaneSend a Private Message to maryjaneEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Aw man, did ya have to associate GI Joe with him? Couldn't you have used Barney the Purple Dinosaur, Teletubbies, or Disco Barbie action figures instead?
GI Joe is cool.

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Report this Post12-23-2010 03:09 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fierofetishClick Here to Email fierofetishSend a Private Message to fierofetishEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Tell ya what, Cliff There would be good money to be made, if you put them all on discs, and sold them by the volume 1,2,3...etc I'd willingly pay $10 just to read them
Nick
Edit to add: could call them the 'PFF CSI files'---'Cliff's Slimy Inbox files'

[This message has been edited by fierofetish (edited 12-23-2010).]

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Report this Post12-23-2010 03:14 AM Click Here to See the Profile for maryjaneSend a Private Message to maryjaneEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

You callin Cliff's inbox slimy?

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Report this Post12-23-2010 03:52 AM Click Here to See the Profile for fierofetishClick Here to Email fierofetishSend a Private Message to fierofetishEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

Nah!! Just some of the content Don
Nick

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Patrick
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Report this Post12-23-2010 04:13 AM Click Here to See the Profile for PatrickClick Here to Email PatrickSend a Private Message to PatrickEdit/Delete MessageReply w/QuoteDirect Link to This Post

 
quote
Originally posted by Cliff Pennock:

The way you formulated it though, an image forms in my head where I see you and your G.I. Joe action figures sitting around a small table drinking tea pretending to be "the local Fiero club".



I believe the drink of choice for one of these morons would more likely be a Slurpee.

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