quote Originally posted by Jake_Dragon: I wish I it was friday

No freakin' way!

edit: I wish I didn't own page 5.

[This message has been edited by BtotheB (edited 10-19-2007).]

quote Originally posted by 84Bill: Granted... you will live the rest of your life in a library full of dictionary's and very attractive librarians who explode when you touch them. I wish I had a V8

I know someone already granted this but I had to do a repeat.

Wish granted, but it's the drink and not an engine.

I wish I had a man cave.

Jim

BTW: Sorry about forgetting the wish on page 3, I was late for work.

granted, but the genie is dyslexic and you get a CAVE-MAN , one from the geico commericals...yap, yap, yap.....

i still wish this was not the high point of my day....

quote Originally posted by tmur115: granted, but the genie is dyslexic and you get a CAVE-MAN , one from the geico commericals...yap, yap, yap..... i still wish this was not the high point of my day....

Granted, all of the hot girls from deal or no deal stop by to brighten your day. But because mapquest sucks so bad they go to the house next door.

I wish I had a man cave

granted... but now the high point is that your in a zoo exhibit and your the star

i wish for balloons!!!!

quote Originally posted by red84sematt: granted... but now the high point is that your in a zoo exhibit and your the star i wish for balloons!!!!

Granted, you come home to a p0rn star covered in little purple balloons. Say hello to Ron Jeremy for me.

I want a knife that will stay sharp no matter what I cut with it.

[This message has been edited by Jake_Dragon (edited 10-19-2007).]

granted, but you are now into self mutilation... first the legs ... sex organs... arm... and

still wish for somthing else interesting

Granted, your kneeling naked on a sidewalk, arms buried in concrete in front of a road sign that says: Welcome To Key West

wish my wife looked like IEATRICE's

[This message has been edited by Back On Holiday (edited 10-20-2007).]

The end of the rainbow is found, but instead of gold it ends at a salvage yard full of Dodge K-Cars, and there's no way out once you go in...

I wish I had that the universe suddenly shifted and everything was backwards like on Bizzaro Superman's planet...

granted, but bizzaro is your brother now

wish, i wish for a complete 350 vortect small block with 350 horsepower, sitting in my truck right now

[This message has been edited by red84sematt (edited 10-20-2007).]

granted, but its siezed, and your truck has shrunk to the size of a go-kart

i wish for a better last wish .... florida? (ugh)

quote .... florida? (ugh)

Granted, your kneeling naked on a sidewalk, arms buried in concrete in front of a road sign that says: Welcome To San Francisco

I wish for a cup of coffee right now.

quote Originally posted by Back On Holiday: Granted, your kneeling naked on a sidewalk, arms buried in concrete in front of a road sign that says: Welcome To San Francisco I wish for a cup of coffee right now.

Granted but I was sleepy when I made it and used yesterdays grounds.

I wish there were some good movies out.

quote Originally posted by Back On Holiday: Granted, your kneeling naked on a sidewalk, arms buried in concrete in front of a road sign that says: Welcome To San Francisco I wish for a cup of coffee right now.

Granted, but that's not creamer in there.

I wish for the new 2009 Camaro. (don't go for the obvious on this one)

EDIT: Crap ! I type too slow.

[This message has been edited by jimbolaya (edited 10-20-2007).]

granted, but it a matchbox and insterted sideways ala "jackass"

i wish for my headaches to go away...(and the voices too....)

quote Originally posted by tmur115: granted, but it a matchbox and insterted sideways ala "jackass" i wish for my headaches to go away...(and the voices too....)

Granted, but you now realize the headaches and voices were just a filter for all the crazy real voices you now will be hearing.

I wish that Matchbox Camaro was gone.

Jim

Granted! It was only gone for a minute. Every time you threw it away, it would always re-appear like the Twilight Zone. Now it will follow you around like a puppy dog till you are buried in the grave, and even then it will be in your casket and it will haunt your ghost.

I wish that I had a mini-van

quote Originally posted by Wichita: Granted! It was only gone for a minute. Every time you threw it away, it would always re-appear like the Twilight Zone. Now it will follow you around like a puppy dog till you are buried in the grave, and even then it will be in your casket and it will haunt your ghost. I wish that I had a mini-van

Granted, but its got a 454 mounted mid engine and does wheelies.

I wish I had Wichita's mini-van

quote Originally posted by Jake_Dragon: I wish I had Wichita's mini-van

Granted, but a grizzly bear that was sleeping in the back mauls you as your speeding down the road

I wish for a beer right now.

granted, the bottle appears but at the other end is the same bear that was in the mini van now hes upset that you took his lunch away....

i wish the voices would stop.....

quote Originally posted by tmur115: granted, the bottle appears but at the other end is the same bear that was in the mini van now hes upset that you took his lunch away.... i wish the voices would stop.....

Granted, but now the voices are replaced by random, high pitched squeels

I wish for 2 more wishes

granted, but go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars, oh and ur wishes can pay ur jail fee

i wish for, i wish for, i wish for.......................... yes i wish for a polar bear

Granted, but it's dead because polar bears don't live in Wisconsin.

I wish for my sore throat to go away.

[This message has been edited by Jaygee79 (edited 10-20-2007).]

Granted, your throat feels fine , however zombie polar bears are biting you

i wish polar bears lived in wisconson

granted, polar bears now live in wisconson but unfortunatly YOU now live in the north pole.

I wish i was the best looking man in the world, all the girls would instantly fall in love with me (except the uggo's and chubbo's :P )

[This message has been edited by kawana (edited 10-21-2007).]

quote Originally posted by kawana: granted, polar bears now live in wisconson but unfortunatly YOU now live in the north pole. I wish i was the best looking man in the world, all the girls would instantly fall in love with me (except the uggo's and chubbo's :P )

Granted, your now Elvis and youre dead.

I wish I didnt have to go away today.

quote Originally posted by Jake_Dragon: Granted, your now Elvis and youre dead. I wish I didnt have to go away today.

Granted, your now in the hospital getting a coloniskopy (bad spelling ;p )

I wish for another coffee (no cream!)

granted steaming hot 7-11 coffee, but theres grounds in it and it was made before they were open 24 hours.....

i wish i didnt live in the north pole anymore

granted, now u in anartica.


i wish there was unlimitied oil forever, i hate gas prices, should only be 1.50

quote Originally posted by red84sematt: i wish there was unlimitied oil forever, i hate gas prices, should only be 1.50

Granted: but everyday is a struggle because dinosaurs still roam the Earth and you have to hide under rocks and are a vegetarian because most of the edible creatures left are looking to eat you instead of the other way around.

I wish more people had wished me happy birthday, in fierofetish's thread. I now know that I am loathed and despised on the forum.

[This message has been edited by F-I-E-R-O (edited 10-21-2007).]

quote Originally posted by F-I-E-R-O: Granted: but everyday is a struggle because dinosaurs still roam the Earth and you have to hide under rocks and are a vegetarian because most of the edible creatures left are looking to eat you instead of the other way around. I wish more people had wished me happy birthday, in fierofetish's thread. I now know that I am loathed and despised on the forum.

Granted, except all those who WOULD have wished you a happy birthday are inside a T-Rex Belly.
I wish T-Rex's Could tell F.I.E.R.O. Happy birthday

Granted, but every time a T-Rex says happy birthday, they have to compulsively eat a human. And your family just happens to live in the T-Rex's nest.

I wish I was back home in Canada right now.

[This message has been edited by AntiKev (edited 10-21-2007).]

granted, you are home but its your birthday and theres a t-rex in the room with you....

i wish i knew where anartica. was....

quote Originally posted by tmur115: i wish i knew where anartica. was....

Granted, but you are now on the moon with an excellent view of the Earth holding a map, wishing you had a space suit.

I wish there were more hours in the day.

[This message has been edited by F-I-E-R-O (edited 10-21-2007).]

Granted there are now more hours in the day but there are also less days in the year, so technically you are like 80 years old.

i wish i didn't eat that beef in the fridge, i dont feel so good

quote Originally posted by kawana: Granted there are now more hours in the day but there are also less days in the year, so technically you are like 80 years old. i wish i didn't eat that beef in the fridge, i dont feel so good

Granted, but because you didn't eat the beef, the cow came to your house with his whole herd and trampled your house.

I wish I hadn't said something stupid to my girlfriend just about half an hour ago.

quote Originally posted by AntiKev: I wish I hadn't said something stupid to my girlfriend just about half an hour ago.

Granted, but now your girlfriend loves you more than life itself. She follows you everywhere, hangs on every word, worships the ground you walk on. She stalks you day and night. You find listening devices everywhere so she doesn't miss a single precious word you say. She loses her job, ignores her friends and is completely absorbed with you. You get a restraining order which she ignores. You wake up in the middle of the night to find her leaning over you, listening to every breath you take. You finally decide to move to a forest in Oregon and live in tree surrounded by strings of metal cans and end up talking only to yourself and a stray cat that couldn't care less what you say.

I wish the garage would clean itself...

[This message has been edited by F-I-E-R-O (edited 10-21-2007).]

quote Originally posted by F-I-E-R-O: I wish the garage would clean itself...

Granted but now the garage has decided it "doesn't need you anymore" and is plotting your demise...

quote Originally posted by OKflyboy: I wish I had not forgotten to put a wish in my last post...

Granted, but that anime girl in your avatar is actually a transvestite and is shooting at you

I wish the Eagles had not let the bears beat them.