Fogelthorpe, you think THAT's Bad?
I can do much worse than that!!
An old fisherman and his wife were happy to see the birth of their twin sons, but couldn't decide what to name them. They decided to wait until they got older, & name them according to their actions. When the twins were about 4, the fisherman noticed that one would always stand and stare out toward the sea, & the other would stare away from it, so he named them Towards and Away.
A few years later the old fisherman took the twins out to sea to fish, but returned that night without them. He explained to his wife, that Towards had hooked a big fish and fought him for hours. Finally the strength of the huge fish overcame Towards and pulled him overboard, turned back and swallowed the boy whole. The fisherman's wife cried out at this news, but the fisheran exclaimed, "If you think that fish was big, you shoulda seen the one that got Away!!"